A Gun To My Heart

38

"Can I join you tomorrow? When you're meeting your people?" His jaw tenses for a second before he answers me, continuously writing. Ticking off boxes on the paper. Justifying his choice. Letting the ink soak into the expensive paper.

"My dad is the one ruling over the country, so technically they're not 'my people.'"

"You know what I meant."

"Have you asked your mother for permission to join us?"
Us. He and Azia. I wonder what people think of her. To me, she looks sharp-minded. Always on guard when it comes to communication. Always looking through people's lies.

Which is useless when the one at her side never listens.

Her appearance is breathtaking too. I resent that she's so pretty. Her eyes are always glowing. They're always the focal point in a room. She's always the focal point in the room. Everyone's gaze is constantly drawn to her at first.

Noting her beauty and skills. I envy her.

"No, but I don't need to. I'm not a child, and I can make my own choices." He smiles at my sudden attitude, discreetly tugging at his tight lapel around his neck. My hands instantly begin to unbutton it. Pulling each button out of the buttonholes. He stops me by gently laying his hand on mine.

"What? That's straight up restraining your breathing. No one's here anyway, you don't need to be perfect all the time. It's okay." He rolls his eyes in silence with a small smirk on his face, ignoring me as I'm resuming to unbutton it. I don't want him to feel uncomfortable at all.

The thought of him having a fling with Azia in the past makes me wonder. Did he know how ungrateful she is? Would he 'date' a person like that? It sounded like it was a really short summer fling, but what's her side of the story?

Stop.

I come to my senses, ending whatever I was starting. My body moves to his closet, looking at how neatly he placed my clothes. Is he trusting me now? Or is he still choosing, putting on a veil covering the difficulties he might have?

Slowly, I close my eyes - calmly focusing on the clothes in front of me. Gradually getting rid of the confusing thoughts. Breathe.

My finger traces along with the different dresses, and pieces of jewelry placed on the tiny shelf. Something white. Tomorrow, I have to wear something that will represent my peace.

My fingers dance around the gold jewelry, as I'm deciding which one to pick. They settle on a pair of long, dangling earrings, as well as an innocent matching necklace. In the middle of the gleaming gold pendant hanging off of it, a tiny, purple amethyst is sitting.

Representing power.
Another type of red. Just without the brutality.

I lay the jewelry ready on the small table next to the closet. The dress hangs alongside his steel blue-colored suit. Our outfits match formally. I'm excited to see Azia's face when she sees how the rest of the population lives. How she will react to the insane poverty. Nothing like her own universe.

There aren't any glass roofs or expensive portraits of random people hanging on their walls. There are no costly couches in their homes. No servants. No maids. How will she react to it?

Realize that the system she supports, makes these people stuck in living that way.
Realize that the system she supports makes these people slaves to us.

I'm excited to see her perception of the world melt away. She will finally open her eyes. Look at their homes. How they barely have a standing house. Some, not having a house at all.

How the tapestry at their walls is so worn out, barely hanging on. It's one thing to sit around and hear me talk about it. But seeing it? Experiencing it?

It might finally turn her head. Make her wake up. Fight with me. Help me change the differences.

*

She's sitting in a dark blue tight dress. No sleeves, revealing her slim figure. Her dress is sparkling, showing that she has money, which means she has power. The dark blue representing knowledge and seriousness. This is the last day she's visiting him. She'll leave in the evening.

Her eyes scan me from my heels to the top of my head, not saying a word as the car starts to fly. Control yourself. The message is clear without her needing to open her mouth. I roll my eyes, looking out of the window.

This won't be a long ride. I already see the sudden change in colors. The houses in the villages already stand out. Separated from the gorgeous, green trees. The plants are the only color down there. Yet, the streets look dead. Except for some people walking in them. Just a few.

Either carrying a grey sack on their backs, or without anything. Every house is as I thought. Almost broken down. The roads and paths are broken. Leaving deep cracks all over them.

I turn to look at Azia's face. It doesn't reveal her emotions at all. Almost like she uses a mask made of porcelain. Hiding every single thought and emotion. Just like Aries. But his isn't as strong. I see him feeling for them.

This whole ride has been quiet. Only hearing the buzz of the car. The connection between Aries and Azia is broken. It's different than when she appeared here two days ago. Not so friendly anymore. More formal. More strict.

Her impression of him is gone. Wiped out. Or at least I think it is. I can no longer see the interest in her eyes as she looks at him.

But I don't know. It may also be her new cover made of porcelain. It wasn't being used earlier. Allowing me to see everything she wanted to hide.

Every thought. Every emotion. Every belief.

She uses the cover of porcelain for me. Aware of how I'm working. Understanding that I'm more powerful than she imagined. So, she covered it all. And she's proceeding to cover it. Expertly.