A Gun To My Heart

25

When I walk out to the dining room again, the chairs are empty and servants are already cleaning up. I look out of the tall, blue-tinted windows and see Aries and Azia laughing together.

The sight of her makes my blood boil.
"She's stealing him right from you." I turn to my mom, entering the room as the servants vanish into the kitchen again.

"She's not stealing him from me. He was never mine."
I walk over to the couch and watch her stand next to the tv. Her hair is also braided with the red silk ribbon.

It makes me take the black elastic band out of my hair immediately, letting my wavy hair fall down with the red ribbon. Mom snickers carefully as I play with it in my hand.

"You haven't made any progress and we're running out of time." Her voice is harsh, knowing no one is listening. Every door is closed, leaving us alone with hundreds of windows everywhere.

"You can just seduce Calix into doing it. It looks like he'll do whatever you want him to, already."

"It's all an act, Maeve, " she scoffs. Familiar words.
I lift my eyebrows in surprise, amazed by how she knows it, too.

She's not an idiot. Of course, she knew.

"He has microphones in the garden, that he is using to eavesdrop on conservations."
Mom quickly looks at me, scanning after the nonexistent lies in my eyes.
"Where did you get that information from?"

I keep my mouth shut, leaving her to figure it out herself. When she finally does, she howls with laughter.

"I'll keep that in mind."

"If you know it's an act, how do you plan to get the healers?"

"Use him."
Her ugly, red fingernail points in the direction of Aries laughing with Azia. Why are they laughing so much? What are they saying? Calix would know.

"He's the next leader."

"But he's not the leader now, " I add as I'm wondering what she's trying to say.

"He's the next one."
My eyes dart to hers.

She has a frightening grin spread across her face, completely content with her decision. A dreadful decision she's willing to take when there are plenty of others. A decision that includes the red she craves.

'Red symbolizes power.' I remember she told me when I was a little girl.
I also remember how pretty I thought she was. How amazing she always looked. All that has changed now.
The one thing she forgot to tell me at that time was that red also symbolizes blood.

The red she craves is power and blood.

"... When?" My voice breaks, scared by the vile creature in front of me. I play with the red ribbon in my hand, already trying to figure out what to say to Aries when he finds out.

Knowing that I can't stop her. Knowing that I will see him crying on the floor in front of his dead dad. Just like I did. Knowing he will be haunted by the sight of him every day and night after that.

The only difference is that he'll be all on his own from now on. No siblings. No parents. Just him. Leading millions of people all alone.

"You'll see."
She disappears out of the room, leaving me with the same thoughts drenching me. She knew it. The way my thoughts always drown me. She knew it as she walked out of the room.

She wants me to hurt.

*

After sitting here all alone for a while the door leading to the kitchen slowly opens. Three small heads poke out from the door, showing Lucas and his two friends.

I quickly put a smile on my face as I straighten my posture. Their small feet walk in my direction carefully putting a distance between us as they stop. Both Melody and Noah have silver short, curly hair just like Aries. They look like siblings and even younger than Lucas.

"She looks like a princess, " Melody whispers to Lucas trying not to get caught speaking. It breaks my heart to see them so afraid.
"Are you sure she's nice?" Noah asks trying to seem tough. I almost laugh at his failed attempt.

"Hi, M-maeve." Lucas steps forward, and I wave, trying to make them less scared of me.
"Are you allowed to be out here?" I ask carefully. They all look at each other. Guilt washes over Lucas's face, and he starts to pick at his fingers again.

I quickly grab his hands, letting him sit next to me on the couch. Noah and Melody gasps, shocked that he sits on the couch with me.
"Please, don't do that, " I say holding his hands apart from each other. A small blush spreads across his face.

"Can we sit on the couch too?" Melody asks, and as soon as the words escaped her lips Noah covers her mouth.
"Shush, " he whispers stressed out.

"It's okay, you can speak." Both of them look at me stunned. Melody quickly runs towards me and sits on the couch next to me.

"Melody, you can't do that, " he says again rolling his eyes. I can't help but smile.
"It's okay, Noah." His eyebrows raise in surprise that I even know his name. Slowly but surely he approaches melody and sits next to her.

"You are so pretty, " Melody tells me again as she plays with my hair. Noah yanks her hand away from mine and it makes me laugh. "Thank you, Melody."

I leave the couch and sit on the carpet in front of them.
"How old are you guys?"

"We're 12 years old, " Melody answers without hesitation. Noah on the other hand analyzes my every move. Suddenly the kitchen door bursts open, and we all turn our heads towards the sound.

A woman in a blue dress looks at us. She looks like a sculpture for a moment, frozen in her pose. "Miss Ambrose, I'm sorry you have to deal with these kids."

Her voice is sweet, but she's stuttering. Her hair is also braided flawlessly. Before I can do anything, everyone but me quickly reacts to something I don't know what is.
The kids jump off the couch, and in a swift moment the kitchen door is closed, and I'm left all alone again.