Mcyt -autistic- oneshots

I'm autistic (Wilbur and SBI)

Request for this chapter was: would you also be able to make like a really angsts one where someone (I don't really know who, maybe Tubbo or Wilbur?) has autism but they've never told anyone (minus family and stuff) for some reason so they're streaming and start having a sensory overload but like they're on a call with maybe the dream team and sbi or just sbi if that makes sense

Just as a heads up for this one, it swears, but in real life, I don't swear. So, I'm using asterix's to replace all the letters bar the first one and if there is any confusion just ask and I will find a way to explain the word. Thanks!

Wilbur's POV:

Another SBI stream. This time we were playing uno (we just knew how desperate everyone was for 4/4 content and wanted to hang out anyway). However, even uno gets quite heated, especially when you are playing with me and you then throw Tommy Innit into the mix. Yea, I don't know why I had any idea this would end well. To be honest, being autistic means I've learn that a lot of things won't end well for me. But no one knows that.

My family know I'm autistic, they were the ones who got a letter home when the school thought I should go for a diagnosis. Teenager me didn't care all that much. It had explained why I felt so different growing up and had always struggled to make friends. But by the time I found out, I had a small group of friends and we were all kind of weird. I fit right in. But when I started to do content creation, I had a decision to make. Did I want everyone else to know I was autistic? And my answer was no. No to everything. No to the people I worked with. No to the fans. No to the friends I made.

When I first did Soothouse most of them had known about me being autistic before we started. It was common knowledge in that group as I had known most of them before content creation. They never really had to do much differently. I mean everyone knew that I liked doing the videos a specific way and planning them out as such. But that was just known as the 'Wilbur quirks'. My social skills lacked in some ways but part of our humour as a group were the bad social skills, faked or not. The awkwardness became a bit. I stimmed a lot as a kid but had taught myself not to over the years to avoid bullying. The most difficult thing was actually getting overwhelmed or stressed. Despite being an adult at that point, I still didn't really have the skills to calm myself down from either of those emotions, and I got better but even now in 2021, it's still not great.

But no one else knew. I made efforts to hide the autistic traits I otherwise showed and turned the ones that slipped out, into bits. With the way my life had worked, I was a little ashamed to be autistic in some ways. A little worried about how people would react if they ever found out, in others. So here I was doing another SBI stream and still, none of them knew I was autistic.

Phil and Tommy were streaming. I had been planning to but had woken up overwhelmed which had really impacted my day. I was exhausted having had to go to the shop the day before (which doesn't seem a lot to most, but to me, that was huge) and just not feeling up to it. We had this kind of unwritten rule for SBI streams, if you didn't want to be there, you weren't forced to be. No matter how important it might seem, you were always more important than the content. But talking and playing games with my friends often positively affected my mood, and I hoped that it would give me the boost I needed that day. As you can probably already guess, I did quite the opposite of that.

Techno and I were just chilling in the vc, talking about our days, Phil joined and we said hi to chat. Then the child joined. It was obvious already, he was in a chaotic mood; screaming and shouting about how he was going to beat us all. I put my headphones round my neck for a second, still hearing him scream and Techno and Phil laughing, and rested my head on my desk. I have no clue how long I stayed like that for.

"Will? You there?"

Quickly, I took a breath and put the headphones back on properly, "Yea, sorry zoned out for a second there!"