The Light Before Dawn (BxB)

Prologue

Among these hundreds of lights that made passed through my eyes, the light that you gave me is the brightest among them.

"Give me more, please." Pagmamakaawa ko sa bartender.

We are now here in one of a known bar at the BGC. It's been a week since we've stayed here in Manila. We didn't come to school since it just started two days ago. Wala pa namang pinagagawa sa amin kaya malakas pa ang loob namin na lumiban. Buti ay pumayag ang tatlo kahit na ganito. I needed to do this because I can't help, but to feel the pain I am feeling from the past days. Today was supposed to be the day that we'll go back to Bataan, but I pleaded for a last night out before the academic year starts. Well, at least for us.

"Tara na Caius Benjamin, kanina pa sila naghihintay sa'tin sa parking!" Pagalit niyang sigaw dahil kanina pa nila ako kinukulit na umuwi pero hindi ako tumitinag. Hindi ako sigurado kung sino ito dahil sa hindi ko siya tinitignan. Ang tanging alam ko lang ay lalaki ito dahil sa kaniyang boses.

This is the first time that my heart got broken over someone kaya susulitin ko na ang pag-inom dahil panigurado na bukas, mararamdaman ko na naman ulit ang lahat. I want to get away, to get over this because I don't know if I can move forward without her in my life.

"One last shot, Kayden!" Sigaw ko sa kaniya nang mapagtanto kong siya ang nasa likuran ko. Kanina pa dapat kami nakaalis kaya lang ay ayaw kong magpapigil. Kaya naman kahit umalis na kami sa aming table ay tumungo pa rin ako sa counter para ipagpatuloy ang pag-inom. "Come on! I thought you're my best friend?" I am pleaded him.

"May pasok na tayo mamaya, babyahe pa tayo ngayon pauwi." Ngayon, siya naman ang nagmamakaawa. "Benj, please! Don't wait until Jayden and Chloe get you here!"

"Yeah, eto na." I just gave up not because I'm afraid of the two, but because of how inconsiderate I realized I am to them. Ilang linggo na nila akong sinasalo. All they did is to understand me. Konting pang-unawa lang ang hinihingi nila, bakit hindi ko pa ibibigay?

Habang tinatahak namin ang daan patungon sa Bataan, a memory came into my head. Pain kept bugging me as the song titled "Someone" by an OPM band is playing on the stereo.

Chelsea and I have been together for almost a year. We started dating back in our first year of our college. Among those girls na nagpaparamdaman sa'kin, Chelsea is the one who really caught my attention. I had tons of flings; some are just plain sex. Unlike the other girls I've been with, she's the only one that last more than I could ever expected.

"Please, Chelsea. Nag mamaakaawa ako. Don't leave me, please." I've been holding her hand as say this for thousand times, but I got nothing.

"Benj, I told you ayoko na! I am now inlove with someone else, so please tigilan mo na ako!" After she said this, she rushed through the gate of their mansion, but before she even got there, I hugged her tightly. Making her feel that I can still accept and forget the things that had happened. Kahit pa may gusto na siyang iba ay kaya ko pa rin magbulang-bulagan at ipagsawalang bahala ang lahat. Baka kung sakali na subukan namin ulit ay bumalik kami sa kung ano kami dati.

But after all that, I still got nothing.

"Please... Chels?" I said once again.

"No, Benj. I've had enough of you. I can't do this anymore." Then, she left me all by myself feeling the pain of losing her, losing the person that changed me.

Should I bring back more the old me again? Because I can tell that the alcohol cannot help me, maybe being a with so many girls again can.

It has been more than an hour since I got into my house. Ilang oras nalang ay simula na ng klase pero kahit anong ikot at pagpalit ko ng pwesto ay hindi pa rin ako dinadapuan ng antok. Bahala na mamaya, sana lang ay wala pang gawin gaya nang mga nakaraang araw.

I came to the school without an ounce of sleep and with hang-over. Buti nalang at kinaya ko kahit ganito. Matapos kong iparada ang aking dalang sasakyan ay agad akong tumungo sa building ng aking pangalawang klase ngayong araw. Bago pa ako makapunta ro'n ay agad kong nakita ang lima kong kaibigan na nasa hagdan at nagtatawanan.

"Bro!" Dylan shouted as he saw me going into their place.

"Hey, bro!" Then we did our fist bump. Ganon din ang ginawa ko kay sa Kambal at bumeso naman ako sa dalawang babae.

"Sorry, we missed the fun." Samantha told me.

"That's okay! Did the two of you did not had enough fun?" We all laugh on what I said. Walang nasabi si Dylan at tinaasan nalang ako ng kaniyang gitnang daliri.

"How are you Benj?" Sam offers a hug. Her and Dylan did not join us because they celebrated their anniversary and their birthday, which are both near to each other, out of the country for almost a week

"I'm okay, Sam, don't worry." I smiled at her. "And I know you know that we all hate drama, Right?" I laugh and accepted her hug. Little did I know the six of us are now hugging each other. Hindi namin pinakialaman ang ibang estudyante na nasa paligid namin. This is a rare moment for all of us. We haven't really show this much affection, but I think that it's okay. I really don't know how I can bring back everything that they've done to me, not just for these past days, but also the way they contributed in my life, except to the part of me being a playboy.

We've been together since we were still kids. The family of twins and Samantha have a business together, while Dylan, Chloe, and I attended the same summer camp back then, that's why when we all became classmates, we never really had a hard time knowing each other. We were just two groups merging as one. Maghihiwalay lang kaming lahat tuwing uuwi kami sa kaniya-kaniya naming bahay at ngayon, dahil sa iba kami ng mga kinukuha na kurso. Ang tanging kasama ko lang sa Architecture ay si Dylan at Sam, habang ang kambal at si Chloe, ay mga Engineer.

We are now heading to our classrooms while we are all laughing because of what happened in the last days. Some of it are Jayden almost got kicked out of the bar because of just standing in the center of the dancefloor. We just dared him to that, hindi naman namin alam kung bakit pinuntahan nalang siya ng mga bouncer at pinilit na umalis dahil hindi naman sumasayaw. Hindi lang ako gaanong makatawa dahil sa sakit ng ulo at dahil na rin sa mga iniisip.

We separated our ways now. We'll just see each other to have some lunch in the restaurant near the school. As for the three of us, we are now walking and I can't help but to noticed the familiar body near the door of the classroom.

She's talking to this transferee, the reason why we broke up. I know that, because that's what she did it to me back then, chasing, being this simple and timid girl. That's Chelsea, with those things that she did, I gave in, but the best thing in that is us, fucking all night until we got tired. I didn't expect that because of how she shows herself to me. She's the one who asked me that, I just gave myself in and I think maybe that guy also yielded. After all that's how she got me and I can never lie about that.

Now, I just realized at this very moment how I stupid I am. She's not worth it. I am just blinded by her façade and I can't help myself but to fall into that. Since I got my name for being the son of a businessman, maybe that's the reason why she went after me, but I don't know what this guy has, and that's the last thing I want to care because I know to myself that I am mad at both of them.

I am still hurt but I will still try to do something. Gusto kong may mapagbalingan ng lahat 'to. Not to her, but to that guy, Lucas Raphael.