The Light Before Dawn (BxB)

Chapter 37

"Sorry, Lucas. I woke you up." Bungad na sabi ni Benjamin nang ibaling ko sa kaniya ang aking ulo.

"Are you okay?" I asked in concern because of how his face shows that he's hurt.

"My feet hurts, we walked all over the place earlier." He explained.

"Wait." I said to him and I stood up going to my luggage, getting the oil that I always have because he always felt this.

I went to the rack beside the cabinet and wore my jacket because of how cold I feel by just wearing a thin boxer brief and sando. I also get his because I thought that he might need it since he's wearing a loose shirt and I will remove the blanket into his body. I lessen the cold of the aircon before I went into the end part of his bed and uncovered him.

To my surprise, he's just wearing his brief.

"Shit, sorry!" I immediately turn the blanket back covering the lower half of his body except his feet.

I also handed him his jacket so he will feel comfortable.

"That's all right, parang hindi mo pa nakita 'to." Then he laughed.

"Yeah." And then I laugh with him.

"Go back to sleep, maaga pa tayo bukas. Ako na bahala mag-hilot sa sarili ko."

"Shh. Just try and get yourself comfortable while I'm doing this. This won't hurt. I missed doing this to you."

"Thanks, Lucas."

"Anytime, Benjamin."

After a while of getting into it, I speak.

"How are you, Benj?" I asked him and look into his eyes.

"I'm goods. I already achieved my some dreams. You know, being an apprentice in Europe."

"I'm happy to know that, Benj. I am happy that you got what you really wanted since then."

"Yeah, thanks. I am away with Charles and with my parents, but it's all worth it."

"So, you lived alone during those times?"

"No, I'm with my cousin, Yco. He's just at the same age like us and he's a chef! You two will get along."

"Yeah, I hope so. How about Charles, how is he? Is he mad at me?"

"Charles is still studying in California. He will be in his grade four and no. Charles love you so much to be mad at you."

"Well, he stopped messaging me after months of being connected with him. Buti nalang at mali ang iinisip ko. Galit ka na sa'kin, galit pa siya. Ang hirap no'n."

"He stopped messaging you because I found out about it. Dinamay mo pa talaga si Charles!" Saka niya ako marahang sinipa at tumawa.

"No, I told him to stop because he might get caught and they'll get mad, which he did, but he always sends me your picture. Anyway, is he living alone?"

"He's with Mom and Dad in U.S. That's where we stayed when we left. I just went to Europe after resting."

"Kumusta sila?"

"Their okay. Dad changed and he made up for all those times he went away. So, yeah, we're already okay. He's being a real father now."

"That's good to know. I'm really happy for you." Then I give him my genuine smile.

I want him to feel that I am glad because of what he had achieved for more than years. He left, but it's all worth it. He got what always dreamed of, being in Europe and being okay with his Dad.

Everything really happens for a reason. You just got to hold on to the Man up there and trust Him. Eventually, you'll realized that all of the things happened because he has something in store for each one of us. 

"So, where are you staying?"

"I live in a condo near the highway. Limang minuto ang layo sa'yo. Can come into your unit? Pagluto mo ulit ako pag-uwi na'tin."

That made me happy. Tomorrow after the event, I'll cancel my flight and update Tita about it. Kahit sa akin ka pa tumira, Benjamin. Walang kaso 'yon. Kahit hindi pa malinaw sa aking ang lahat, sa tingin ko ay maganda na itong simula.

"Sure, Benj. I always love cooking for you."

"Sabi mo yan!" Then he chuckled. "Anyway, enough of me. What about you, how are you?"

"Well, my life's really a mess since you've been gone. You know, aside from you leaving, Daddy ." die." 

Shock was evident in his face as he carefully removed his feet from my hand and hug me. Ang kaninang masaya na usap ay napalitan ng lungkot.

For more than two years, I never felt this much comfort in my life. The security that he gives, the love that it covers, and the home I found once again. That made a tear fell from my eye.

I hug him back, tighter than all of the hugs we did back then.

After that, he withdrawn from it hold my hand and look me straight into my eyes. The look that I missed, the one the craves my soul, the one that I have.

A tear fell from it, feeling the sadness, loneliness and grief that I am feeling.

"Sorry for not being present, Lucas. I should've set aside my anger and went back into you. I'm sorry."

"Don't say that, Benj. I understand, okay? You don't need to be sorry for something we don't have any control."

"Yes, but still, sorry. If I knew what happened, I'll fly back to you as soon as I can."

"You're here now, Benj. I may not have you, but you being by my side is already enough."

For a moment we stayed silent. We are just looking at each other, appreciating the night that we have. Crickets are present as well as the waves that's crashing through the sand in the shore. Hearing those made me feel everything again, not that it fade away, but it just came back wanting to explode inside me. Things are still not clear, but one thing's for sure is on how the space between our lips was being occupied as we let ourselves be carried into the cold night and hoping that we'll capture again the beautiful tomorrow.