The Light Before Dawn (BxB)

Chapter 40

It was four in the morning and it was raining hard. I checked my phone to see if someone message me since I slept early last night.

"Son, your flight was canceled due to the typhoon. The moment I saw the news, I immediately check it and good thing that it was re-scheduled tomorrow morning. I'll see you soon. Stay safe."

So, I think I'm gonna stay with him for one more day and I don't how I will feel about that.

Is this a chance for the both us to start a new beginning again? Tang ina.

I stood up and went outside. I make myself a coffee and sit on the sofa as it faces the double pivoted glass door seeing the waves crashing down the shore as the rain falling in it. The sun isn't here, but I am not angry about not seeing it. This isn't me. Every time there's rain, I am always pissed because I won't see the dawn, but today, I feel good. Maybe I just don't appreciate it, it's beauty, it's comfort. Cliché as it might sound, but I think it's with me, feeling my sadness, loneliness, and grief because of losing the person I love the most.

I'll get over this and I am hoping that when the next rain comes this is not the same feeling I am feeling anymore.

After I had my coffee, I texted the five that my flight was rescheduled tomorrow. Now, I am scanning through the pictures of the wedding yesterday. I save the pictures that I am included. I'll miss this, I'll miss everything about them. They are with me on the times that I am not choosing myself and they are still here when I chose myself.

After that, I change my password, deleted all my pictures of him, us, in my phone and deleted the Instagram account that I made just for him. I am sad, but I still try to compose myself to not cry about it.

That's how life is. Even though our relationship ended, I am still happy that I experienced this kind of love even for the short time. I want to have him with me for eternity, but I think that's not what He planned for the both of us and I'll accept it no matter what. I will just look forward on what's ahead of me, on what's to come in my life. I may not like how it went, but maybe it's better this way.

It's already nine in the morning and it's still raining hard. Hindi ko namalayan na nakatulog na pala ako sa kakaisip mula kanina. Kaya naman nang magising ako ay agad kong kinuha ang cellphone ko para ikumpirma na tuluyan ko nang ibebenta ang condo.

Pagkatapos no'n ay pumunta ako sa banyo para maligo. Dahan dahan kong ibinukas ang pintuan para hindi ko siya magising. Natapos ako sa pagligo at lumabas na ako para manguha ng damit. Tinignan ko siya sandali at nakitang gising na ito, nagcecellphone. Nanguha ako ng damit sa nakaayos kong maleta at tumungo muli sa banyo para magbihis. Nang natapos ako ay pumunta ako sa labas para doon ko tapusin ang pagbabasa sa libro na dala ko.

Buong umaga akong ganoon hanggang sa napansin kong lumabas siya. Hindi ko siya tinitignan dahil ayoko. Dumiretso ito papunta sa akin at tumayo sa harapan ko.

"Ano ang gusto mong kainin?" Tanong niya sa akin.

I looked at him with a blank face and speak.

"I already texted Sam." After saying that in a cold tone, I went back to reading.

"Ano 'yung inorder mo?"

Without looking at him, I replied.

"Just ask her."

"Okay." Hindi siya umalis sa harapan ko. Umupo siya sa paanan ng sofa kung saan ako nakahiga. "Usog ka, paupo ako."

Hindi pag-usog ang ginawa ko. Tumayo ako at dumiretso sa kwarto at doon itinuloy ang pagbabasa. I don't want to be like this, I don't want to be mad, but I can't help myself. After what happened yesterday, he'll talk to me like nothing ever happened? That's not how it's supposed to be.