misjudged the notion of love

time to think

Gulf to his side had his hand to his head, to look down his bed at mews back that was too him has he sat to the edge, head hung to place his buttoned shirt on.
Gulf then took in a deep breathe to then fall to his back to place a hand to his forehead to rub a bit.
Feeling the bed shake, mew turned to eye gulf.
"Headache?"
Gulf shook his head to then close his eyes to then let his hand down to then go to his other side, mew looked at him a bit confused, to then shake his head to get up, he was late for work again.
I really hope I do not get the 3rd degree from kirka, maybe I should tell him what I've been up to, I am growing curious to what he would say and do.
Mew lightly chuckled to shake his head at the impossible.
Gulf then opened his eyes wide to then get up without much thought to call after him.
"W..... Wait?"
Mew immediately stopped to look down to then turn his head to eye.
Why is he telling me to wait? He knows I have to go to work.
"I..... Have to go to work. I'm not like you gulf, track is not paying my bills. Well if I could run and do what you can do."
Gulf gritted his teeth to then look down to nod. He really didn't know what else to say and also this feeling he was having was making him feel odd.
Mews lips parted to then take a step towards gulf to then shake his head to then turn about to then go forth.
Why did I want to go to him and make him feel better? Ugh, I am spending way to much time with him right now, I need to get away and I need to go to work, at this rate I could possibly get fired, then where will I be, my life needs to not be always on this situation and to be with gulf.
Gulf then again without much thought went to the edge to sit where mew was to call after him again.
"Um......mew, Are you..... Going to come here after work?"
Gulfs eyes widened to then hang his head to look down.
Why am I always wanting him to be here?
Mew placed his hand to the nob to then eye it.
"Will.....see....."
Mew then opened the door to then leave, gulf took in a deep breathe to then place his hands to his eyes to rub to then flop to his back to then grunt.
Why in the hell do I want him to come back!? He doesn't live here! Fuck! What is wrong with me!
In mews car he was too drive along to think the same.
Fuck, this is bad, I was suppose to end whatever this fucking is and shit! God, why did I say fuck your routine! I can't keep being late for work, I cant keep being around him, jeez it's like we're dating and we're in.....
Mews eyes widened to then turn to the side to hang his head has he shut the car off to then breathe heavily.
No...... No you two are not! This is just a twisted situation that has gotten into a different zone that's it! I am not in love! I can't be not what happened after my first true love, I am never ever going to feel that fucked up emotion again! Not fucking ever! I don't love gulf! He is nothing but a snot nosed, hypocritical homophobic, cute, adoring....
Mew then gritted his teeth and hard to then place his forehead to his wheel to take in deep breathes.
Fuck! I am not in love with him!
To his place, gulf sat to the table with his hand to the side of the neck to rub a bit to eye his food he just made but didn't touch to look at it confused for what he was feeling.
What is wrong with me? Why don't I want him to go? Why do I want him to always be here? Why does my heart beat like this when I'm alone? Is it because we have spent to much time together? I was considering has a friend more then I thought of him has my rapist. Gulfs face grew long to then take his free hand to his food to start to pick at it. He didn't see mew has such anymore.
What am I going to do? What should I do? I need to end things but keep this going with how I am starting to feel, which is like what I felt for.....
Gulfs eyes few big and he leaned to his chair a bit to then get up to turn to lift his head back to then place his hands to his eyes to rub.
No! Mew is nothing like tiru! I am never ever going to fall in love with him! That bastard took my virginity in the way that he did and made me a cynic just like him! I don't want to fall again just to be not caught.
I just can't! No, I don't love him, I'm just sick or something, I am not in love with.....
Bringing his hands down gulf groaned when he heard his door bell had gone off.
Ugh, who could that be?
Gulf turned to then go to the door to then open to widened his eyes in surprise and shock.
"Mew? What are you....."
Mew took a very deep breathe has he looked over gulf to then step in, to then place his hands to his neck to then pull gulf immediately to his lips.
Gulfs eyes widened to then slowly drop to then close, he then placed his hands to mews chest to grip his shirt to then get into this very passionate kiss.
Mew then used his foot to then kick the door shut.