High School Survival Theory

Chapter 36

We walk up to his car. Once we hit the road, I unlock my phone again. There are a few unread texts from my friends in our group chat and a couple of private texts both from Grace and Miles.

Grace: 'Are you leaving with Derek?'

Grace: 'Sorry hun, I forgot I've to drop Meg and Zach to uncle Fred's house for trick or trick. see you at the party'

Meg and Zach are Grace's monsters of younger siblings. She told me earlier that her parents are going out tonight. Her older brother is going to the next town. So she has to drop her siblings to her uncle's place so they can go to trick or treat with her cousins.

Grace: 'Miles is with me, Ashton said he'll give you a ride if you need one'

Miles: 'where in the hell are you gal? I've to leave ASAP'

Miles: 'can't wait for you 4ever'

Miles: 'sorry leaving with Grace, my costume will take forever'

Miles: 'Ashton said he'll give you ride if you need one '

I stare at my phone blankly. They are not the person whose text I'm waiting for.

Derek left just like that. With no text, no call, not even a bye.

I wonder what's up with him lately. Yes, he's the captain now, he has lots of responsibilities, we are both seniors and busy with college applications and schoolwork, but that has nothing to do with us.

Derek was always the one who was holding back a bit in our relationship. I get his reason why. His career is his first priority. I never minded. He supported my dreams and I did the same.

Still, sometimes I wondered if he would have supported it if I still wanted to major in Photography in college. He's always into this 'real job' thing that I hated.

But he's not exactly wrong. 

I wonder if Ashton thinks the same.

I hear Ashton sigh beside me. "It's okay to let them out now."

I turn my head outside the window. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Sometimes it's okay to cry. Tears wash away all the anger and sadness you feel. It feels bad for a while but worth the outcome."

"Do you cry?" I ask.

I watch Ashton's reflection on the window. He nods, very slowly.

"When there's no one around," he murmurs. "Until it's someone who cares about me."

I nod. I don't think I can make myself cry, especially in front of someone else, even if it's only Ashton.

I never cried in front of anyone after that evening when Miles found me.

"I don't want to think about it right now," I say. "I'm not ready."

Ashton the reflection nods in understatement.

But he doesn't snort or make a remark when the traitorous tear runs down my cheek.

The car stops in front of my house.

I don't make a move to leave. Ashton doesn't ask me to.

I stare outside the window. Mom and dad will be leaving tonight for Australia for their anniversary week. Usually, they go exactly a week away before their anniversary, but since Australia is going to be a long flight, they booked tickets a day early.

"Are you coming to the party later?" Ashton asks softly.

I answer his question with a glare. Ashton gulps as his hands shoot up. "I was just asking."

I sigh and look back at our house. The front porch lights are turned on.

"I wanted to go to the party badly," I tell him.

"I understand."

"I even bought this Peter Pan costume last Sunday."

"Cool," Ashton chirps. He doesn't comment on my choice of a costume like Derek did when I told him about it. I don't ask him if he's going. Of course, he is going. He's our party king after all.

'He doesn't go to the parties anymore,' my inner conscious part reminds me of the conversation we had with Asher and Cora all those weeks ago.

I push the thought aside. "What did you get for Halloween?" I ask.

Ashton answers it with a smirk. "You think I need a costume?" He gestures a hand down his body. "Ladies will be disappointed if I try to hide this glory." I roll my eyes.

"If the costume isn't refundable," Ashton says. "Use it next year in college."

Then the smile he gave me, it looks so adorable that the Derek situation almost slipped my mind.

This boy has become my drug officially. But he can't know that. Otherwise, he will never let me live with it.

I start to leave the car.

"Thanks for saving my sorry ass once again," I tell him before getting out.

"I didn't do anything," Ashton says. "Call me if you need anything."

I mutter an 'Okay' before walking inside my house.

I open the door ajar and my mouth drops on the floor.

Mom and dad jerk away open from each other immediately.

"Kiara, you're back," dad says as he examines the nonexistent dust on the photo frames on the walls.

Mom comes over to hug me. I notice the luggage packed beside the door. A smile forms in my face. Maybe this vacation will sort out all their problems.

"When are you guys leaving?" I ask them.

"The flights after midnight, we'll leave by nine," dad informs.

"Wanna have your dinner now?" Mom asks.

It's only a little past seven. I smother the smile on my face and shake my head. "I'll heat something up later," I tell her and climb up the stairs with a goofy smile on my face. Seeing my parents happy made me feel happy too.

With everything in my life falling down right now, I only want my family to be happy.

I want to feel the love and happiness I felt while growing up. And seeing my parents like that (even though I would need to wash my brain with detergent later) brings back all my hopes that I was losing.

I hope things will remain this way forever.

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