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Chapter 29

Maddie has lost her colors. It didn't happen overnight, I just realized it now. Her pink satchel was the only noticeable thing about her. She wasn't cheerful and happy when she saw me. This time she didn't even smile and I wondered how my parents didn't realize something.

The next thing I noticed when we were walking up the stairs into her classroom at her school was that she was scratching herself all the time. When I asked her why she just said it was itchy. When I asked where and how often she only said everywhere and especially at night. I would probably only get more precise information from a doctor, but my mother would take care of it. I sent her a quick message. Maddie told me she was itchy. Have you been to the doctor with her?

I knew exactly what was happening to her. It's the slow realization what is actually happening here. At the age of nine you don't understand that yet. I can't even remember the first time because it was almost irrelevant for me back then. The mere thought that it was just a few hand movements was too insignificant at the time. It happened, I did it, and it was over. I mean, it was over until it happened again.

can i ask you something abt doctor stuff

Sure

lets talk abt someone

someone is itching and scratching all the time

Where?

everywhere

its worst at night

Rash?

i think not

Could be everything

Dry skin, clothes, maybe a skin disease

I have to look at it

i dont think theres smth to see

I don't know how to help you

Does this someone let me take a look?

nevermind

They should see a dermatologist if it's constant

I gave Maddie's teacher the certificate and told her we went to the doctor yesterday and that she was better now. The teacher accepted the lie and I said goodbye to Maddie. Maddie asked me if she could come to see me today later.

„Of course you can, Maddie," I said to her. „I'll talk to Mom. I'll write you later, okay?"

When I was walking out of school I called my mother. I still had over an hour before I had to go to work. I had no idea if my mother was working and, to be honest, I didn't care either. I called her a second time. Then I just drove home and made myself a coffee.

What are you doing this evening?

training

Give me times

i work til 6, training starts at 8 probably til 12 not sure yet

6-8?

not coming to ur house

I never said you have to

I need details Oscar

i dont know

maybe taking a nap or just chill

i dont plan every second in my life

So you'll be home for sure

probably

i dont like where this is going

Don't worry about it

My Mom called me while I was working and I called her back during break. „Hey."

„Hi Oscar. How are you doing?"

„Did you read my message?" I asked while smoking.

„Oscar," she sighed. „You really don't need to worry about Maddison. It's not that we don't see her." Oh, really? „I made an appointment with the dermatologist."

„Have you been to a doctor?"

„I just told you I made an appointment."

„With the dermatologist. When?"

„End of this month."

„By then you could have gone to the doctor ten times. Maybe they can help her."

My mother was quiet for a moment. „Why don't you mind your own business, Oscar?" she asked then. „You don't have to blame me at all. You hardly see Maddie. Don't pretend you're suddenly the perfect brother. Maddie's fine, you would know that if you'd come by more often. She won't die until her appointment. It's just a little itchy."

„Maddie's not fine," I said in a firm voice. My fingers tightened on the phone. „If you'd open your eyes and didn't just take care of your successful children, you would have noticed by now. Maddie's not doing well. Not at all."

„You have no clue about Maddison, Oscar. You know nothing about her. She's my daughter and I know her very well to know that she's doing perfectly fine. She's a good student, she's healthy and well-behaved. Don't get involved in something you have no idea about."

„Do you know what David is doing, Mom?" I couldn't see the world around me because of anger. „Do you know that Maddie doesn't like to be at home and doesn't like to go to school either? Do you know that she's scared?"

„What nonsense are you talking?" My mother asked angry. „Just go back to your stupid dance lessons, Oscar. Your father and I are good parents. I don't need to listen to this shit."

„Yeah," I laughed. „Of course you are good parents. You raised me and I turned out amazing, didn't I?"

„There's no use in talking to you anymore. I'm hanging up."

She hung up before I could ask, so I just decided to overcome my anger and ask her per chat.

can maddie come to my place after school

she wanted to

ok, wrote my mother when I got home later and lay down on my bed. I sighed and hesitated for a few seconds, closed my eyes. Then I stood up again to pick Maddie up.