Azriel | Lux Ex Tenebris ✓

Chapter 16: A Spark of Light

✧Misma POV✧

"Concentration, girl. Concentrate on what I tell you and what you have to do!" Amren ordered. I looked at her, staring with eyes wide open. Gods, I was already trying to focus so hard and nothing happened. I was trying my very best and it was not good enough. I hated it. Hated that I was not good at anything. I had powers, but what were they good for if I could not use them?

Nymph filth, good for nothing but breeding. The Hewn City inhabitants' voices filled my head. My stomach churned when memories of their mocking faces filled my mind. How they had looked at my sister and I when we were out–with so much disgust and mockery in their eyes.

But maybe I really wasn't good for anything?

I had just finished that thought when my palms suddenly prickled and tingled. There was suddenly was something. I felt it–felt the power all of a sudden flooding me. I felt hot all over my body, energetic even.

A small spark of light appeared in my palm. It was just that small kernel of light. It moved slightly but then disappeared again–vanished into thin air.

"Shit," I grumbled, feeling disappointment settle into my chest. Amren's eyes narrowed in on me. A muscle in her jaw flexed, her gaze trailing over my whole figure. She inhaled a deep breath and dipped her chin at me.

The entire evening before Gwyn and I had done mind-stilling exercises as well as worked on my breathing. I came to the conclusion that Gwyn was a very patient person, using a lot of time to help my impatient self with calming down and clearing my mind and focus on my breathing.

I had been way too impatient. Gwyn told me that she would be the rock against which I could let my unruly waves crash. She would help me calm down, she would help me find rest. And she had really managed to do so. The mind-stilling had really helped, but it did not necessarily help with the light summoning. When it came to light summoning I was rather hopeless.

"Why did you let it go?" Amren queried, a reprimanding tone lacing her voice. Her eyes were still narrowed.

Shrugging one shoulder, I pursed my lips. "It wasn't my plan. It just disappeared," I huffed, covering my face with my hands. We had been on it for the past four hours. Only one hour was left and I would finally be able to leave and meet my sister.

Rhysand arranged a meeting with her and with Rani, Salim's brother. The High Lord trusted Rani as he had supported him greatly during the war with Hybern. Rani would pick me up, bring me to my sister and protect me. Rani would also bring me back later and then Azriel or someone else would again pick me up to bring me home. I really hoped it would be Azriel but the others were also alright, of course. Still, a small part in my heart made a happy skip when thinking about it being Azriel.

"Where did that spark come from this time? What did you think about?" Amren asked, leaning forward and putting her hands on my knees.

"My sister, I think. I thought about the good parts of our childhood," I told her. I knew had only told her half the truth, but I wasn't really ready to confess my crush on Azriel to Amren.

"Alright, that is good think about it again!"

"I try, but nothing happens," I told her, waving my hands in front of her face. My hands that were neither covered in golden lines nor carried a spark of light on them.

I tried over and over again but nothing happened anymore. I was really hopeless. I had a gift and a special power but I could not use it.

"Have you gotten word from your old friend already?" I then asked her, pouting and she quickly shook her head.