dream smp x reader : oneshots

↳ ❝ schlatt catch up ❞

Prompt: ❝ preference catch up: schlatt ❞
Request? nah

CW!: the bottom preference contains drug usage; if this makes you uncomfortable, feel free to skip
CW!: this preference contains some nsfw content, nothing like actual smut, but sexual comments; feel free to skip if this makes you uncomfortable

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❝ dating schlatt would include ❞

➥ he kisses you to shut you up lmao

➥ like if you are angry or just talking a lot, he just kisses your lips, and you just stay quiet out of shock

➥ he invites you to jackbox lobbies whenever he gets the sponsor

➥ like you just fuck around with ted, charborg, charlie, swagger, kryoz, and 24framesofnick, just doin the funny thing

➥ twitter lowkey hates you, just because you're dating schlatt

➥ like theres so many posts talking about how people hoped you would have changed his humour for the better, but nothing happened

➥ you keep a chalk board up that counts the days since he was last cancelled

➥ you both just say stupid little jokes in eachothers ear in the most seductive way you both can manage

➥ you both make a lot of sexual jokes about each other

➥ jackbox lobbies with both of you are basically just a way to get out the sexual tension lmao

➥ you both just fuck around on his wii a lot

➥ whenever one of you is a guest on a stream, the other isn't ever afraid to come in and interrupt

➥ you both interact so much on twitter it's insane

➥ and you both know how to get the other to interact

➥ like if you see someone on your timeline talk about how schlatt hasn't posted in a while, BOOM

➥ you two fight a lot more than should be healthy, but somehow you both stay together

➥ like since you both are stubborn as shit, when you two fight it's a lot

➥ it either ends up heated or spicy, theres no in between

➥ but everything ends up fine in the end

➥ just give you two like 3 days and it'll all be okay

❝ night in/out ❞

➥ night outs 100%

➥ like he just 'flexes' his money and brings you to really nice and expensive places

➥ sugar daddy who?

➥ he ends up literally styling the mutton chops lmao

➥ like he makes an effort to look like a relatively nice

➥ you both look like a red carpet couple, but gone wrong

➥ he posts it on twt and insta, but of course, with the infamous filter

➥ schlatt in a tux anyone?

❝ how you spend halloween ❞

➥ either drunk, or at some sort of cc! party

➥ and if it's the latter, ooo fuck, you two have fun

➥ parties are lowkey really fun for you two

➥ cc! Parties always seem to half that 'party in the college dorm at 2am' kinda vibe

➥ lots of alcohol no matter what

➥ spiked punch + sexy costumes

➥ who would want anything different

➥ it's a whole ass vibe tho

❝ couples costumes? ❞

➥ it takes a lot of convincing

➥ he only agreed because he wanted to see you in your costume, and you refused to do so unless he wore his

➥ sex y rabit

❝ making you blush ❞

➥ he says the most sexual shit omfg

➥ like he'll just say shit about how he fucks you

➥ just out of nowhere

➥ whether it's in a jackbox, a stream, or when it's just you two

➥ he just makes sexual comments in general

➥ it isn't even light

➥ like it is the most sexual shit he can muster-

➥ ex: "i'd say suck my dick, but you'd end up fucking yourself on it so-"

❝ if you were a stoner ❞

➥ doesn't give a fuck

➥ since he grew up in NYC, he always knew what to look for in a plug

➥ so he just knows if it's the good shit or not

➥ he 100% goes for the stronger shit

➥ like fuck pens n carts, it's all about blunts and the bong

➥ he can prolly roll a blunt up really fucking fast

➥ whenever y'all get drunk, y'all get high

➥ whenever y'all get high, y'all get drunk, it's just how it works