Two more songs in this chapter
Olivia's song is She Used to Be Mine from the musical Waitress https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2-aUNmYNLM&list=PLmiTbrWhM0nm4c7QiiVguJSWf2_n3AK_O
Rafael's song is The Joker and The Queen by Ed Sheeran (this song was from Terryn) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9f4XtNj1Vg
As Rafael recovers, Olivia deals with her own experiences and realizes how much Rafael means to her.
After spending some time with Noah, Olivia came to the hospital to see Rafael. She even had some of his favorite snacks on hand and a card from Noah to cheer him up.
"Noah misses his Uncle Rafa. He also wanted you to hold onto Eddie to help you feel better."
"I never trusted that elephant." Rafael says and the two adults chuckle. Rafael frowns suddenly
"What if Noah finds out about what happened?" Rafael said.
"That you're the man that saved his mother's life? He'd be proud." Olivia said
"I'm also the one who almost got her-"
"Rafael please don't finish that sentence." Olivia chokes out
"If, if it were to have happened, I never would have blamed you. It would have been Wheatley that caused it. The only thing I ask is that you be patient with me while I deal with this, and I promise I'll do the same with you." She says sincerely
Rafael feels a weight lifted off his chest, He spent nights upon nights worrying that if god forbid the worst happened to Olivia it would be his fault. The screams he imagined were starting to die down. But even while he's healing through his own trauma he has to take into account Liv's as well. She was touched and groped in a way no woman should ever be. She may not admit it but he can see a change in her, there was a hollowness behind her eyes. Rafael vowed to bring her comfort and wholeness back as best he could.
"How are you Liv? You have cared for me so much, I want to make sure you are okay."
"I'll be honest Rafa. I'm not okay. I was very scared. A monster saw me vulnerable and the man I love saw me exposed when I wasn't ready. I never wanted you to see me like that. He made me touch him, and I can't, I can't."
She stops and shakes her head trying to push away that memory
"I can't take the shame. And I think the hardest part was that if he raped me I would've lost you."
"Liv I-. I've never been so afraid in my life for you. It all seems like a whirlwind but also like a nightmare I can't seem to wake up from. But I can promise you this, nothing he could have done would ever make you lose me. I would and I will support you, to remind you that nothing he said was true. You are more to me than just a pretty face or something I would "take". You are my rock, and I will do everything I can to give you back what he took from you."
Olivia Benson knew that she was blessed with a good man. And not just by word, but by deed. He was going to support her through her struggles and in return he got the two most precious things she had: her vulnerability, and her heart.
