GRISHAVERSE X READERS

[KAZ BREKKER DRABBLE]

Prompts: B28. "I've been gathering my courage to talk to you for so long and now... I did it." (modified it slightly) + B97. "There's absolutely nothing wrong with you."

A/N: Changed B28 slightly to make it fit better for my idea.

Word count: 883

The Crow Club was unusually quiet today, just a few customers were present and they weren't even fully drunk. You made your way towards Kaz's office, the new information about the next heist in your pocket. You hoped Kaz would be pleased, that information wasn't easy to get. The door was slightly open, and you were just about to knock on it.

"Kaz, Y/N cares about you too," you heard Inej's soft voice say and stopped in your tracks. "I know you think that you don't deserve them-"

"That's right Inej, I don't," Kaz snapped and you could almost hear him glaring at her. "I wouldn't be good enough for them, I would only disappoint them somehow."

"No, you wouldn't. We've all seen how they look at you, and how you look at them. They know you enough, you deserve-"

"I asked you here to go over the plan, I didn't ask you to give advice on my love life," Kaz grunted and you heard a parchment rustling.

"Fine, but remember that Y/N necessarily won't wait for you forever," Inej said and they stopped talking. You contemplated going in for a second, but figured it wouldn't be wise. But you knew that you wanted to talk to Kaz about this sometime soon.

Everything had happened so fast - a million kruge for the alleged Sun Summoner had taken you through the Fold, all the way to Os Alta, and now you were on the run back as Alina escaped. Inej was wounded and you all agreed on returning to Ketterdam, even though Kaz had to be persuaded into it. But eventually he too had to face it - Inej being in her full health was crucial for the plan to succeed.

Kaz went outside after announcing that you'll be crossing the Fold again in Arken's train and return to Ketterdam from Os Kervo, abandoning the mission. It was clearly hard for him to decide, but you were proud of him. For once, he put his friends' safety before profit and kruge.

Night fell, and Kaz was still outside. Jesper and Inej ushered you to go talk with him and after a while of whispered bickering, you gave in.

Kaz didn't even look at you when you stepped out, but you knew he knew that you were there. He had made a fire and skinned a rabbit Jesper shot earlier for dinner, and you had to admit that the smell of it made you kind of hungry.

"Hey," you mumbled and slowly made your way to him, sitting beside Kaz on a log. He didn't answer anything, just staring at the fire and you crossed your hands on your lap and stared at the fire too.

"Are you hungry?" he asked suddenly, and you shook your head. It was a lie, but you didn't feel like eating right now.

Damn it.

"Kaz, I heard you talking to Inej a few weeks ago." you blurted out. He visibly stiffened, and you knew that he knew perfectly well what conversation you were talking about.

"So?" he grumbled and you swallowed.

"Since then, I've been gathering my courage to talk to you about this and now... I'll do it." you muttered, glancing up to Kaz shyly. "I know that you have feelings for me and you think that you're not good for me, but that's not true. You are good enough. More than good enough."

Kaz finally looked at you, his eyes reflecting the fire. He shook his head slightly. "Y/N, you don't understand. I'm broken. You wouldn't be able to take it."

You restrained yourself from reaching out and touching his hands as you spoke your next words, "You don't know that. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with you."

Kaz pursed his lips together and didn't answer anything, turning his gaze back to the fire. You sat in silence for a moment, before you sighed and stood up, making your way back to the barn. Kaz stared into the fire, your words echoing in his head over and over again, fighting with his other side saying that he has to stop caring for you, but he couldn't help but admit it - he had grown to need you and know you're safe at all times.

His worst fear was losing you, something he had swore to never feel about anyone. In the Barrel, every single day could be your last and such fears were dangerous. But he knew it already when he gave Heleen The Crow Club as his collateral for you and Inej. It wasn't just because you two were useful for the heist. He felt disgusted that you had had to work for the Menagerie, and with you, he was furious that Heleen still owned you. And now he was losing The Crow Club, but still... he would do it again, even if he knew the outcome. You were more important than the club, as much as he hated to admit it.

But would he be ready to love you like you deserved to be loved? Would he be ever able to really show you how much you mattered to him? He knew there was only one way to find out, and maybe he would be able to take his biggest leap for you...