Chloe's Book Reviews {CLOSED/ HIATUS}

Bonds And Bones

Username: darkest112

Genre: Werewolf 

Chapters: 5 chapters including the Prologue

Specific: N/A 

Book 

Cover - 

The cover is nice and pleasing to look at. The only thing I would say, and this is personal style, but I would use a pen name on the cover instead of the Wattpad username. That's because if you decided to upload the story on another platform, they will have your username and it's not professional. Using a pen name will cover your identity, but will also give you a professional vibe and feel. Again, it's your choice. 

Blurb - 

I like the blurb, but I feel like you give away too much in the main paragraph. We know she doesn't fit in, that she doesn't know her father, and that she is a werewolf with a demanding inner wolf. We know her life is miserable and that she has a rocky relationship with her mother. You tell the reader that her mother gets killed, which is something the reader should find out. You even included that her pack gets rid of her and she goes to a new pack. There is nothing that I haven't read that has happened in the first five chapters I read because it's all in the blurb. 

Let the reader know some things, but keep the rest hidden like a secret. There needs to be a balance of not being vague, but not giving away too much. It's like a trailer for a movie. Have you ever seen a trailer where the whole plot is thrown in and you feel like there isn't any need to watch the movie, it's the same thing. Keep the reader guessing. 

Grammar - 

(Prologue) 

You use quite a few filter words. By removing words such as 'only' 'just' and 'actually,' your writing could be more precise. 

Here are some examples...

"She couldn't believe that her mate had actually rejected her..." 

"Her mate was just but a mere pack doctor..."

"She only took four shots..."

Suggestions could be...

"She couldn't believe that her mate had rejected her..." 

"Her mate was a pack doctor..." (Personally, I would rephrase this as to "Her mate was the doctor of the pack...")

"She took four shots..."

(Chapter One) 

You switch tenses throughout the chapter. The majority of the chapter is in the present tense, so I would advise sticking to the tense you are more comfortable with. 

Examples of the past tense... 

"I tiptoed into our house, crossing my fingers and hoping my mom wasn't in." 

"I wasn't really in the mood to get scolded and yelled at..." 

"I wasn't being rude..."

"My life was far from normal." 

"Pain was no stranger to me anyway." 

Suggestions to the present tense could be...

"I tiptoe into our house and cross my fingers, hoping my mom isn't in." 

"I'm not really in the mood for her to yell at me over small, petty issues that have little to no importance in our lives."