Chloe's Book Reviews {CLOSED/ HIATUS}

Warriors stars of Blood

                                                                       (Bookworms Review Community) 

Author: @Beecafe

Chapters: 3 chapters

Genre: Fanfiction

Specific: None

Cover-

The cover is different, and I liked the starry background. The symbol of the cat symbolizes the story. However, I would suggest including your name somewhere on your cover. It's very important to stop people from taking your cover and story. It also lets the readers know that you wrote the story and who the author is.

I thought the book cover, which is displayed in "part one" is better. That is just my opinion.

Blurb-

"The daughter of StarClan is born." Sandstar announced.

There should be a comma in place of the full stop.

It should look like this...

"The daughter of StarClan is born," Sandstar announced.

Other than that, your blurb looks fine.

Grammar-

(Prologue)

Your example...

"But he will look weak if admit the truth that puts his clan in danger."

This sentence can be made clearer. Also, I would suggest changing "admit" to "admitted" since you are writing in the past tense.

A suggestion could be...

"He will look weak if he admitted the truth that could put his clan in danger."

(Something like that or similar)

                                                               ✿

I know what you are trying to say in this example, but it can be read rather oddly.

Your example...

"Every cat eyes locked him their blazing pair making Wavestar's fur prickle."

A better suggestion could be...

"Every pair of cats eye's locked their gaze on Wavestar, making his fur stand up."

Sometimes playing it safe with words is better.

                                                               ✿

"Cats let out cries of horrors as the thunder made a small part burn."

Again, this sentence seems off. You just need to switch around some words to make the sentences flow better.

A suggestion could be...

"A small patch of land started to burn as the cats wailed in horror."

I think you meant lightning and not thunder. Thunder is noise, but lightning creates lightning bolts, which can start fires.

                                                               ✿

"...it was standing on the burn."

A suggestion could be...

"...he/she stood on the burnt grass which caused his/her feet to blister."