Unexpectedly Attached To You

Chapter 25

Once noon hit, pinuntahan ako ni Anthony sa labas. He didn't say anything and if it weren't for the sound of the door opening, aakalain kong mag-isa lang ako dito.

I felt his presence behind me, just standing there. Alam kong siya 'yon kahit hindi ko siya tignan because he's the only person who would do that. It took me one deep breath for him to sit next to me. Hindi na ako umiiyak pero the feeling of him next to me made me tear up again.

Pagod na akong umiyak. Pagod na pagod na. Gusto ko lang ng konting pahinga, konting comfort. Pero imbis na 'yon ang matanggap ko tuwing kailangan ko, mas dumadagdag lang ang sakit sa loob ko.

"I'm sorry." Pabulong na sabi ni Anthony sa tabi ko. Alam kong ang intensyon niya ay pagaanin ang nararamdaman ko but I cried even harder to his words.

He wrapped his arm around my shoulder then gently rested my head on his shoulder, petting my head. I couldn't explain the amount of comfort I was receiving from his simple gestures. Sa lahat ng tao sa buhay ko, siya ang hindi ko aakalaing tatabi saakin. I never expected a father figure in my life but here he is trying his best.

We all make mistakes in our lives. Even fathers.

"Dad, what happened?" Tanong ko as I stared into the distance with my head still rested on his shoulder.

Naramdaman ko na medyo nagulat siya. I called him dad for the first time. I've thought about what Theo said last night. I couldn't call him dad and I didn't know why. Siguro kasi hindi pa ako komportable o nadala ako sa salita ng kuya ko na hindi niya deserve ang title niya. But throughout the recent times that i've needed someone by my side, he was there.

I know it might appear as me trying to win him over because of the timing, but I genuinely think that he deserves the simple gesture of respect of me calling him dad.

"Why did you leave?" Tuloy ko.

"I felt overwhelmed. Sobrang pagod na pagod ako sa trabaho nung mga araw na 'yon. I had so many responsibilities. Pakiramdam ko hindi ko na-enjoy yung pagiging bata ko. When your mother told me about you, I felt so many negative emotions. It was bad. Kasi hindi ako natuwa. I looked at you as if you were more work. I didn't want to overflow. Natakot ako na baka kapag hindi ko mapigilan yung sarili ko, baka pati kayong magkapatid at mom niyo ang masaktan ko. So I left. Para sa ikagagaan ng loob ko para na din sa kasiguraduhan na hindi ko kayo masasaktan through my actions." Mahabang paliwanag niya in a very gentle voice.

"Masakit pa'rin naman saamin na umalis ka." I said. Hindi na ako umiiyak. I just listened to him because I really wanted to know what he felt at the time.

"Alam ko. That's why I accepted that no matter how many 'sorry's I say, hindi niyo ako mapapatawad." I felt the way he took deep breaths.

"I forgave you. But it was quite selfish." Amin ko. "Did it help? Yung pag-alis mo?"

"Oo naman. I was a little hard to come back dahil takot ako na hindi niyo ako tanggapin. But as I said, I will do my best. Sinigurado ko din na noong bumalik ako, sainyong magkapatid lang ang atensyon ko."

"Maybe sometimes, hindi masamang maging selfish." I smiled to myself. "Ayoko nang mag med school, dad." Amin ko ulit.

"What do you want then?" He asked me.

"I want to know kung anong kailangan kong gawin para makapag-trabaho sa company mo? I don't want to run it. I just want to be a part of it." Nagalangan pa siya but he ended up explaining to me kung ano ang dapat kong gawin para makapag-apply sa kompanya niya.

It was an estate company. They buy estates or just lands then sell them after improving those said estates. They also partner and employ engineers, architects, etc to improve what needs to be improved.