Ruin me | minsung

Chapter 13

"So are we going to talk about what just happened? Or are you going to deny it again?"

"I'm fine Minho, I don't need help..." they were driving again, jisung looking out the window still.

"You told me you keep having those nightmares and that's why you can't sleep, I think it's concerning that they have such an impact on you"

"They don't, I'm fine."

"Who are you trying to convince? Me or yourself, because I can assure you it's not working" they stopped at a red light, Minho looking over at the younger.

"Do you always get those? Every night?"

"Y-yeah...though yesterday night I didn't" he blushed at the thought of it. When he was curled up against his chest he didn't even think about it. It was the first time in months that he didn't have that recurring nightmare.

"Well good...maybe the fact of sleeping next to someone helps"

"Maybe..." they were getting closer to his apartment, he was just getting more and more anxious because of all the thoughts in his head. So much so that he didn't even notice they arrived, they were now parked right in front of it.

"I'll see you soon" Minho smiled at him, not really knowing if he should give him a hug or not. His worries brushed off when Jisung went in for a hug, wrapping his arms around his neck before leaving the next second.

"Thanks for the ride" he gave a small smile, closing the door of his car.

<3

"Why did you guys leave so early this morning"

Chan walked to his coworker with a coffee in hand, handing it to him.

"Oh we had things to do" he said in his best liar voice, truth is Jisung is a horrible liar, he'd much rather say the truth. This situation was particular though, he had a secret and he intended to keep it for Chan's sake.

"Okay, but eh hey I wanted to talk to you actually..."

"Yeah what's up?" Jisung looked up from his new file, closing the tabs he had opened.

"I hope I'm not invading your privacy but...I was wondering why you insist you're straight...always like if being gay is something bad...?"

He's never thought of it that way. He didn't want to be seen that way because he was taught that he would burn in hell if he ever even looked ever at a man for more then a friend. For some reason, he's never even questioned Felix and Chan together. He would never treat anyone differently, regardless of the sexual orientation, everyone but himself.

"It's complicated"

"What is? It just seems like you mind...when me and Nathan kiss you look disgusted...are you repulsed by us?"

"I- no of course not Chan, it's just I'm...I've been taught other wise about people like you and-"

"People like me..?" Chan frowned, looking rather disappointed.

"That came out wrong, I'm sorry let me expl-"

"Don't bother" Chan walked away, going to another separate room, making Jisung sigh.

He honestly just didn't like people kissing in front of him, he didn't care wether they were two girls, two boys or one boy one girl. He couldn't care less what they labeled themselves, it was about what the people said to him. What they put in his brain to be damaged forever.

He was working on his case, but he couldn't even focus on it, too distracted by what just happened.

"Fuck..." he ruffled his hair, knowing he'd have to open up about a dark time in his life for Chan to even look at his again.