rose tyler... | doctor who

remembering her | thirteenrose

i'm so tired of being here,

suppressed by all my childish fears,

the doctor couldn't sleep. she found herself having nightmares. they weren't always the same dream, per say, but they revolved around the same thing, or rather, person.

rose tyler.

this most recent one was the worst.

"rose!" the doctor cried. standing in front of her, on the beach that she had taken yaz to, stood rose tyler.

rose turned around and cocked her head.

"sorry, do i know you?" the doctor jumped, of course rose wouldn't recognize her. she wasn't the same man she was back then.

"it's me, rose. it's the doctor. i've regenerated, quite a few times actually." the doctor smiled, kicking the sand awkwardly. "it-it's been quite a while since i've seen you. how-how long as it been for you?"

rose shook her head.

"i'm-i'm sorry. i don't know any doctor." her face turned from confusion to disgust and anger. "at least none that matter anyways."

the doctor wiped the smile off her face.

"what do you mean? haven't we met yet?"

"oh we've met." rose snickered. "but i wish we hadn't. you're a fake, and a phony, and there's never been anything i want more than the universe to be rid of you forever doctor."

the doctor stood still. suddenly, rose's face contorted in pain, and out of her arms began to grow tentacle looking things.

"you are the worst thing that's ever happened to this universe, doctor." the voice that came out of her mouth wasn't hers.

it was the voice of a dalek.

the doctor had woken up screaming for rose, with yaz, graham and ryan at her door shouting for her.

"doctor are you alright?" yaz cried. she rushed over and kneeled by the doctor, who had fallen to the floor.

and if you have to leave,

i wish that you would just leave,

cause your presence still lingers here,

and it won't leave me alone,

the doctor had done her best to reassure the fam that she was fine. she was thousands of years old, she had seen tons of things.

"doctor, you were screaming." yaz had argued. "please talk to me, it'll help you feel better."

the doctor shook her head.

"not this time yaz." the doctor stood up. "end of discussion, i'm not talking about it any further."

the tone in her voice made yaz retreat. she didn't want to upset the doctor, she had just wanted her friend to talk to her.

the doctor felt bad, she didn't mean to snap at yaz. but rose was an off limits subject. she refused to discuss her, not even with her closest friends.

these wounds won't seem to heal,

this pain is just too real,

there's just too much that time cannot erase,

everywhere they went after that dream, the doctor was thinking of rose. she was thinking of that dream, and the voice of a dalek coming out of her precious rose's mouth.