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"clara please." the doctor breathed. "aye, for me. help him. go on. and don't be afraid."
she didn't say anything.
"goodbye clara. miss ya." he took a breath. "i've got to make a call. one more call."
"to who?" clara's voice was shaky.
"are you afraid of the big bad wolf clara?" he didn't wait for an answer. "because right now, i am so, so terrified."
he ended the call without waiting for a response. a deep breath allowed his hearts to calm down and he immediately began dialing the number he had committed to memory so many years ago.
after a few rings, it was answered.
"hello?" a familiar woman's voice answered the phone.
"hello, rose." his voice was deep with the pain he was in. "it's me."
"i'm sorry who is this?" she asked.
"it's me, rose." he heard her breath hitch slightly. "it's me."
rose's heart sped up in her chest. she found herself hoping, praying, it could really be him. there was, after all, only one person in the universe who would introduce himself in such a manner. but she didn't let her hopes get up too high.
"i don't know how long it's been since bad wolf bay. but i hope you still remember me." the doctor sighed. rose felt a tear drip down her face as she realized it really was him. "because i can't forget you. i can't ever ever stop thinking about you."
it was her doctor.
"doctor." her voice was strained. "is it really you? you sound, different."
"it's me, rose. always will be." he took a deep breath again. "but times are a changin' and it's comin'. i can feel it. i have a feeling this one's gonna be a whopper."
"you're-you're regenerating?"
"second time now since you've been gone." he chuckled. "do you remember the drunk properly skinny new year's eve all those years ago?"
rose gasped.
"it wasn't-"
"i bet you're gonna have a really great year." the doctor choked out. "you were the last face that face saw. but i can't come see you this time."
"oh doctor." rose was fully crying now. "i wish i could be there."
"you're still with him, with me, aren't you?"
"yeah." he could hear a hint of a smile. "we're getting married. in the morning actually."
his hearts panged. how could he wish for her to be with him traveling and putting herself in danger when she was getting married and having the life she deserved?
"good. don't leave him rose. don't leave me. i would do anything to be there with you. but i can't be."
"are you alone?" she whispered.
"no. i've got clara. but oh rose," his voice dropped, "she's not you."
"you need someone doctor. you can't be alone. please, for me, promise not to be alone."
"i promise." he could never deny her. "rose. i've got to go. i can't stay."
"i know."
"there's something i never told you." he took a breath. "something that i never told you that day at the beach. something i wish so so badly that i had said when i had the chance. something i need for you to know."
"i know." rose whispered.
"rose tyler. i love you."
"i love you too, doctor." she wasn't crying anymore. "my doctor. i hope i'll see you again someday."
"you know you can't." his hearts broke. "times change and so must we. you'll grow old with him, with me. and i'll never forget about you. have a good life rose tyler."
"i know. this is our last goodbye. and i'm so glad i got to say it, for real this time."
"i don't know how to say it." now he was crying. "i don't want to say goodbye. not forever. i can't take it."
"then don't." she sighed. "say it like you'll see me again, doctor. say it like you're coming back to me. please."
"well then, rose tyler. i look forward to marrying you in the morning." they both chuckled, and the doctor felt himself starting to relax. "i will never stop thinking about you. rose tyler, defender of the earth."
the tears kept falling from his face. his breathing was labored.
"goodbye rose."
"goodbye, doctor." and the doctor hung up the phone. it was almost time.
he couldn't hold it for much longer, his regeneration was upon him. but he was scared. without rose to see him through this, how would he be able to bare it?
"rose tyler, i still need you." he wiped his tears as he slowly made his way towards the tardis. but despite his tears, he couldn't help but smile.
somewhere, in some universe, he still had her. there she was, holding his hand still, and that was all he ever really wanted.
