Are You Sure? (Marina)

Fourteen.

Carina

"Hmm that- that's actually a great idea. I hadn't thought of that." Dr. Montgomery looked back at our whiteboard and wrote down the technique I offered as a suggestion. I was on cloud nine. "I can't wait to scrub in with you DeLuca, Amelia has talked up a storm about you."

"Grazie mille Dra. Montgomery, I'd love to scrub in." I wanted to be in the OR watching her perform stitch by stitch and cut by cut. I was more than attracted to her mind, it was also her skill. It was professional admiration since I first saw her.

"Do you want to expand from OB? Or have you just been reading a lot?" The question reminded me of different times in my life. The urge had crossed my mind. She looked at me intently waiting for an answer and I half smiled because I just thought of my dad.

How he went in a manic surgical frenzy and I couldn't apply for the fellowship because I had to take care of him after it all happened. "Once. I had a family thing and couldn't. I do read up on studies as they come but since the fire, more so."

"Ah yes, I heard but it's never too late. If you change your mind, let me know and we can do something about that." We smiled at each other and my phone went off. I read the text five times before I fully believed it.

"Oh my god!" She turned back to look at me. Placing her hands on her hips and waited for me to say what needed to be said. "We have a donor! Female, 34. Same skin tone and everything!"

"Well let's get Meredith and get this going, our patient has had enough to deal with." She grabbed her white coat and gestures for me to move ahead of her.

We moved out the door to go notify the patient and tell her the news. She was apprehensive but after I walked her through the logistics of the surgery and worst case scenarios she was imagining. Then, as I always tended to do, laid out the best case scenario. "All of those things can happen Celia, but if you don't try you'll never know if you can have that beautiful bambino. We've already retrieved and fertilized the eggs, they are also waiting. All there is left to do is try and fight for this. You've been in a war. This is very different because it's a war with your body, but you are strong and this is the push."

"Okay. Okay, let's do it" I smiled and squeezed her hand. She looked at me and for the first time I felt like I was myself. At work, helping patients get a step closer to having their families.

"Okay let's get you prepped. Wilson prep her and take her up" I said at my resident and gave the patient one last squeeze before leaving the room to go scrub in preparation for transplant.

I scrubbed my arms and laughed at the joke Addison said in reference to Amelia. "Dr. Montgomery, me and Amelia are just friends. There is some lingering sexual tension but we are friends."

"Addison, you can call me Addison- so you and her have never?— Interesting, the way she talks about you-" As she was about to finish the sentence Meredith walked in to start scrubbing.

"No, just friends, flirty but none the less friends." I let my arms drop off the excess water then brought them up to my chest.

"Okay then. Let's move Grey." She laughed and entered the OR. I looked at Meredith confused.

"Don't worry me and Addison are good." I nodded. Watching her scrub away at her arms.

"You also said that about Andrea so scusami if it's hard to believe" I stepped back from the sink and turned to go.

"DeLuca, I'm sorry about Andrew. He said he was okay and I wanted to believe him. My gut believed you but my heart wanted to believe him" she looked at me and I nodded at her because I didn't want to argue before surgery.