Damaged goods

15

ALYSSA

"Yes, dad I'm fine."

"Alright bye," I mutter, ending the call.

Why did I do this? My dad is beyond pissed at me. They're on their way back from California. I rest my head against the pillows. My head aches again.
I held the temples of my head.

"You okay?" someone asks.

I looked up at Ezra, who was standing at the door. "What do you want?"

"I'm sorry Alyssa. I'm so sorry. I acted out, I wasn't thinking straight. I just imagined what would have happened if you hadn't come downstairs. You wouldn't be-" he pauses and inhales a sharp breath.
"I'm sorry, okay."

"It's okay," I whisper.

"I didn't mean to react in that way, I was just scared I was going to lose you."

I shake my head. "You won't lose me." I reassured.

The door opened. Jennifer smiled at me. "Hey Alyssa, you okay?"

I nod. "I'm sorry." I whisper, looking down at my lap.

"Don't apologise sweetheart." Jennifer smiles reassuringly. "You're going to be okay now." she says.

The door opens yet again. This time Tristan and Liv came in, Liv ran to the side of my bed. "I knew you shouldn't have," she mutters as she hugged me. I let go of her. "I know."

Tristan shot me an disappointed look. "We just got you back, don't leave us again," he mumbled as he walked over to the edge of the bed.

If only they knew. If they were in my situation, I'm so sure they would have done the same. Anyone would have. Having parts of your memories erased making you not know what exactly happened is eerie. I just wish someone understood.

                                       •••

"I'm so mad at you right now, I can't even look at you." my mom yells.

I look down at my lap, blinking back my tears. "Do you know how much we've done for you?" she continues. "You just ha-"

"Stop fucking yelling at her." Ezra interrupts. "Do you think yelling at her is going to do anything? It happened there's nothing you can do now."

"I can't do this right now." she murmurs, walking out of the room.

I wipe away a single tear that fell from my eye. It's all my fault. My mom and dad did so much for me and I made it worse. "Hey don't cry." Ezra says, sitting on the edge of my bed.

"I fucked it all up, I made them move from California to here just for me to fucking take drugs. What is wrong with me?" I cry.

Ezra bought his thumb up to my eyes, wiping away my tears. "My dad won't even come in here." I continue. "It's always my fault."

He sighs. "Alyssa don't say that, like you said you had a reason to take those drugs. You wouldn't have done it without any reason. It is not your fault."

I shake my head. He won't understand. He doesn't even know what happened.

"I'll call Olivia in here, I need to do something."

                                         •••

EZRA

I'm enraged.

Very fucking enraged.

What type of parents were they? For fucking blaming her. I left the room. I found liv and Tristan sitting in the waiting room with Justin and Rose.