Damaged goods

31

ALYSSA

"I don't know if i'm ready to go back."

Kara sighs. "You know what I think."

"What."

"I think you are ready to go back but you're just scared."

"Of what?" I ask.

"Everything. You have been back from the hospital for a bit over two weeks now. You haven't been to school in way over a month and now that you might go back you're scared of what people are going to say."

That honestly made more sense. "What should I do?"

"I think you need to go back in. You know your friends, be polite, smile, let everyone know you're fine. No one will ask you any unwanted questions and if they do politely decline. Just try it out for me Alyssa."

"Okay."

Kara and I concluded that we should make one day in the week a key day for our therapy appointments. Sunday seemed the best to fit. "Tomorrow?" I ask.

"If you can."

I let out a shaky breath. "Okay then. I'll talk to you next week."

"Good luck. You have my number in case of any emergencies."

"Yes i do. Thank you."

"Take care, Alyssa."

She ends the face time and less than a second later, my door opens and Ezra enters. "You alright?" he asks.

"Kara advised me to go back to school tomorrow."

"That's soon," he says.

I shake my head. "Not really. I've been at home for weeks now. I think I need to. You'll be at school too, right?"

"If you are then I am too."

"Perfect."

•••

I ran a shaky hand through my hair. "Breathe Alyssa," Ezra said.

"I don't know if this is a good idea."

His hand reaches out to my thigh, and he lightly squeezes it, making me shiver. "We'll stay for an hour or two and if you're finding it difficult we'll go."

I nod. "Okay."

"You'll be okay buttercup."

We get out of the car and slowly made our way to the school. It was so fucking crowded. As we walk through the corridors, I felt Ezra clasp my hand.

"What lesson do you have?" he whispers in my ear. I didn't even acknowledge the words coming out of his mouth, as we walked through the hallway. I didn't ignore the many eyes that followed us or the whispers that followed after.

We turn to an empty corridor, thank fuck. I let go of Ezra's hand and sighed. "Did you see how they were staring at me?" I say.

"Let them stare. They won't say anything to you, they're a bunch of pussies."

I open my locker and grabbed the only book I had in there. "We have English." I say.

"Yes we do, let's go buttercup."

I ran a hand through my hair and followed Ezra to English. I can do this.

                                       •••

Me: remind me to tell Ezra to fire you.

Kara: *laughing emoji* don't be silly Alyssa.

Me: next week will be interesting. Can't believe I listened to you and went back to school.