Tease Me, Bella Beatrice

54:

"I don't know, 'ma. Stop bothering me."

I heaved a deep sigh after calming myself before answering my mother's questions and everything. Ilang beses na siyang nagpapabalik-balik dito sa kwarto ko rito sa bahay namin. I am at our parents' house doing what I normally does. Write and them distracting me. Kagaya ngayon na walang tigil si Mama sa kakatanong sa akin.

I have been here for two weeks straight. One week after I got my alone time. So, it has been three straight weeks na sinusubukan kong idistract ang sarili ko sa mga isipin. Gigi and I haven't talked since then. I just called her once after that little fight telling her I am sorry I almost shouted on her. She understood and told me it's better if we focus on our jobs at the mean time. Wala namang galit or kahit na ano para mag-isip ako nang mag-isip. I am sure na busy si Gigi at alam niya at naiintindihan niyang kailangan ko ng kaunting pahinga. The only cons I am having now is missing her and wanting to talk to our baby.

Fuck. I want to hug her so bad.

"Anong you don't know, anak?" Pagpapatuloy ni Mama na mukhang naiinis na sa akin. Nakapamaywang siya sa may pintuan habang may dala-dalang hanger. As if she is going to teach me a lesson like when we were still kids. "E kung parapakan kaya kita nitong hawak ko? Tinatanong lang, e."

"Hindi ko nga alam, 'ma. Hindi pa nga kami nag-uusap, e. Why don't you call her yourself?"

"E ayaw ko naman baka busy sa trabaho-"

"Exactly. Busy si Gigi kaya kahit ako ay hindi ko siya dinidistract." I sighed once again. "Busy din po ako kaya naman please stop bothering me. Bababa na lamang ako mamaya-maya kapag kakain na."

"Napakaano nitong batang ito. Tss. Diyan ka na nga."

Napailing na lang ako nang marahan nang dahil sa inaasal ni Mama. She really be do acting like a kid sometimes. Namimiss niya na raw si Gigi at kung bakit daw ba ako nagpunta rito e hindi ko man lang siya sinama. I don't have any courage to tell her we are still not talking and the situation between us is messy and hard right now.

Matapos kong makitang isara niya ang pinto ay bumuntong-hininga na lang ako muli saka itinutok na ang atensyon sa sinusulat ko ngunit hindi pa nagtatagal ay muli na namang may pumasok. I thought is her again, but I was wrong. Naudlot tuloy ang pagkainis ng mukha ko.

"Oh, 'Pa?"

"Kakain na. Nasa baba si Jordan." He said and left after that.

Sandali lang naman akong nagtigil at inisip ang sinabi niya. Sometimes he really is so cold. Wala tuloy akong choice kung hindi ang i-save nang maayos ang progress ng isinusulat ko at bumaba na rin. Tama naman si Papa na nandirito nga ang kapatid ko. Nakaupo na agad siya sa hapag at handa nang kumain. Ganoon din si Mama at si Papa. Just like what we always do, this set up never gets old. Para lang mga eksena noong mga bata pa kami. The only thing that changed is that we are growing old but still the same closeness and child-like energy. Kay Jordan ako tumabi siyempre.

"Oh, buhay ka pa pala?" He asked me sarcastically. "Writing mode?"