Growing pains ( Sequel to Life changes )

☆24☆

☆Beca's point of view☆

The two weeks are up and it's time to leave on the tour. Chloe and Ryan have met at the office to send me off on my tour. Since it's a smaller tour I only have one tour bus and Sutton will be the only one traveling with me to make sure I get to the venues on time and everything in between. She is basically a glorified babysitter for this tour and I don't know how to feel about it. I make my way over to Ryan first, pick him up and rest him on my hip.

,,I will see you in a few months, okay little dude? Make sure you are good for mommy." He hugs me back tightly.

,,I love you, mama and I will miss you." I put him back down, then make my way to Chloe and pull her in for a hug.

,,I love you baby and don't you ever forget that. If you watch the live streams, make sure you really listen to the lyrics of these new songs. I'm going to warn you they are darker than you are used to."

,,I will make sure to listen to every word. Now, before Sutton comes over and drags you away, give me a kiss." Chloe says and then pulls me in for a passionate kiss that I can tell she is trying to last. I pull her closer not wanting the kiss to end but I know it has to, so reluctantly I pull away but keep our heads together.

,,I love you with all of my heart and don't forget that, okay?!" She nods and gives me one more quick kiss and then she and Ryan step back allowing me to board the bus. Sutton comes over and sits down next to me.

,,You sure about this, Beca? We can always cancel this tour. I know it's a hard time for you now." I steal my gaze.

,,This is exactly what I need right now and hopefully they will still be here waiting when I come back, it's still hard to face them."

,,Okay then. Bus driver, take us away." The first venue was in Boston, Massachusetts so we had a four hour drive where I made my way to one of the bunk beds and put my set list together. At least that's what I told Sutton I was doing, I really was separating myself so I could cry and break down on my own with her judging eyes or feeling her pity. The entire tour was very emotional for me because I kept having flashbacks of the first tour where Chloe and I were so happy to have our family together and us growing our family in secret from everyone else. But now all I feel is sadness and all of those happy memories are tainted with the pain of losing our baby. From all of the crying it wore me out because I had managed to fall asleep throughout the drive. Sutton came over to my bunk and told me we were about thirty minutes from the venue and that the sound check would happen right when we got there. I nodded and made my way back to the front of the bus.

Sound check went off without a hitch and I'm amazed at myself for making it through without crying; then again I didn't sing the full songs but instead only parts of them. Then the make-up team comes into the dressing room and helps get me ready for the show, thankfully it takes a lot less time due to it being a smaller venue with not as big a stage so I don't need as much make-up. Before I head on stage I send Chloe a text reminding her to sign in to the live stream so she can watch. I look over at Sutton who is smiling at me and gives me a thumbs up signifying the live stream is up and ready to go. I make my way on to the stage and sit down at a stool that is in the middle of the stage in front of a microphone. I take a deep breath.

,,Good evening, Boston. Thank you all for coming to my show tonight, I want to let you know that tonight will be a different side of my music that you are used to. They are more emotional and give a bigger insight to what I have been going through these past few months." I clear my throat. ,,Now, let's get this night started." After that I start my set with the songs that include; "Love me Anyway", "Someone's Watching Over Me", "Leave Out All the Rest", "Gone Too Soon", "Until the Day I Die", "Tears in Heaven", and then I finish off the set with "Come What May."