BSD Scenarios

Dazai's Announcement

(A/N: here, have a crack version of chapter 6 of Opposites Do Attract. This is once again inspired by a comment I got.)

The agency: *all tending to their work*

Kunikida: *doing his paperwork as always*

Dazai: *watching Kunikida in a totally not creepy way at all*

Ranpo: *notices*

Dazai: *thinking about the events of yesterday and how much he enjoyed hearing Kunikida's screaming*

Kunikida: *feels like he's being watched and turns to see Dazai*

Dazai: *keeps staring at Kunikida*

Kunikida: ...Dazai, why are you staring at me?

Dazai: Because I can.

Kunikida: I see.

Dazai: And also because I'm appreciating your beauty.

Kunikida: *starts to feel an inexplicable sort of way* Oh, um...thanks?

Dazai: You're welcome~.

Kunikida: *looks away, feeling his heartbeat quicken*

Dazai: *grins* I mean it, Kunikida. You're very beautiful.

Kunikida: *gets more embarrassed*

Ranpo: *thinks: so one of them finally sort of admitted their feelings, about time*

Dazai: *gets another idea and climbs up on his desk and stands there*

Kunikida: Dazai, get down from there.

Dazai: I can't until I make my announcement.

Kunikida: *thinks: I have a bad feeling about this...* What announcement...?

Dazai: EVERYONE, GUESS WHAT?!

Ranpo: *also has a bad feeling about this*

Atsushi: Mr. Dazai, are you sure this is something you should be saying?

Dazai: Of course it is, young Atsushi. Now, is everyone listening?

The agency: *falls silent*

Dazai: *grins* I NEVER GET TIRED OF HEARING KUNIKIDA'S LOVELY SCREAMING!!!!!!!

Kunikida: ... *hides under his desk*

Ranpo: No one needed to know that. And who just publicly admits something like that?

Dazai: Me, just now.

Atsushi: Ah...that's um...nice. *decides not to comment further*

Kunikida: *hiding under his desk, convinced that he's actually going to die of embarrassment*

Dazai: It had to be said, for it's the truth. Everything about Kunikida is beautiful.

Kunikida: *starts to feel a little flustered*

Ranpo: Simp.

Dazai: Shhh.

Ranpo: *shrugs* I'm not wrong.

Dazai: *pouts*

Yosano: *appears* Please never publicly admit that again. We didn't need to know that.

Dazai: *pouts more* But Yosano...it's true.

Yosano: My point still stands.

Dazai: *pouts more* Y'all are mean. Hey, Kunikida?

Kunikida: What?

Dazai: Can you come out from under there?

Kunikida: No.

Dazai: Aww, why not?

Kunikida: Because.

Dazai: Because why?

Kunikida: Just no.

Dazai: Ok, fair enough... *pouts*

Needless to say, Kunikida stayed under his desk for the rest of the day and only left once everyone else did. He spent a good hour or so that night wondering if it was possible to die of embarrassment.