Agent Assassin's Achilles ✔️

7. Where Is Daddy?

Explaining to Khanyi that her father had to go back to work was soul-sucking and I hated it, she was devastated and barely ate the entire day.

Greta and I felt that our time in Bora Bora was over, we wanted to enjoy our holiday but Khanyi needed a new view and distraction from her father's absence and her mother's bleeding heart.

We charted a jet to Norfolk, Greta is an amazing grandmother, she kept her entertained while I spiralled out of control, a tornado with no clear direction besides leaving a path of destruction.

Eighteen hours of flying and I played a game, every time I thought about Kai, I would take a sip and my my my do I think of my husband quite a lot, whether that is because the fucker is cheating on me or because I feel betrayed, I am not sober enough to feel my feelings.

We had to clean the house a bit when we arrived as there was a bit of dust, I was too hungover to help so I took a nap. Thankfully I can handle myself well enough that Khanyi does not notice the difference, or I hope she did not.

Greta called and informed him of where we were and his only concern was Khanyi. If he cared about us, he would be here, not with Anya.

"Fuck!" I scream as I throw the lamp at the wall, stay away from men, they told me, told me a million times and my God do I wish I listened. Stay away from him, he is not good for you, my head would tell me and my heart and soul had no time to listen.

"What is wrong?"

"Your son." collapsing onto the bed, I hold my head in my hands,

"What is it?"

"Uhm, he is not happy, he has not been happy for a while, he is falling in love with another woman, he says he is just attracted to her but he is forming a bond with her." a deep breath "I don't want to lose my husband." muttered between gritted teeth and a wounded heart

"You do not own people and maybe this is a season you two should separate."

"I don't want to separate, I want him here, I want him in my house, I want him around, I want him, I have been pinning for him ever since we lost Leon and he just seems to slip further and further away."

"Was therapy not helpful?"

"For me, it helped a bit but for him, it does not seem to have done much. He still gets triggered by it, I guess I can not blame him but he blames himself and it consumes him."

"Do you blame him?"

"Oh God no. I blame myself, he could not have known that a gunman was going to try and kill me, he did not know and I am lucky to even be here right now I should have done something at that moment but I did not, I just froze and waited for those bullets. I killed Leon with my inaction."

Her hand on my back we just sit in silence. I hate thinking about Leon but whenever I look at my body all I see is him, the saggy skin on my stomach, the bullet hole scars, the C-section scars, imagine delivering your dead baby? With your husband burdening himself with guilt that is not his to hold.

I have not seen my father since Christmas, we head over to his new house. We bought him a beautiful house near ours so when we visited, Khanyi could walk there and back.

"Hey, ntate-moholo!" she says jumping into his arms

"Lumela le wena, setloholo." [Hello to you too, granddaughter]

"Kene ke u hopotse." [I missed you.]

"Thank God, because I missed you."

"You did?" she says with her arms still wrapped around my father's waist "Can I stay the night?"

"Yes, Khanyi, we can spend the night." she nods pulling him into the living room so she can show him her dance routine. Greta follows and I head to the kitchen to pour myself a glass of wine and drink until I am drunk.

I am a sad, sad woman without my husband.

Getting woken up by your father pouring water on your face is not fun. The disappointment on his face, froze me in stone, I hated knowing that I disappointed my hero.

"I thought you were coming next week." Sibo is rolling a joint as we talk

"I would have if Kai was not being an asshole."

"What happened?"

"He finds this girl, Anya, attractive, he is forming bonds with her while she is saving his ass. We got into a fight, I brought up Leon and he left."

"Damn, are you okay?"

"uhm, I am losing my mind, I do not want to lose him, he is my person."

"You are not losing him."

"I am, Sibo, I am losing him to Anya." fucking bitch but it is not her fault, she is not married to me. "I barely know what she looks like."

"Probably for the best."

"Do you think you could find her for me?"

"Can I? Sure, will I? No. You will drive yourself mad."

"Sibo please, I need to know."

"Kamo, No. Now we are going to go upstairs and hang out with my fiance."

"Sibo, I just need to know, what he wants from me."

"Call him then."

"He won't answer."

"He will," she says getting up and dragging me upstairs. It annoyed me that she would not help me with this but part of me did feel as though I am going overboard being crazy unnecessarily

We had lunch and soon I left and went back home, Khanyi and Greta are baking a cake, it makes me happy how close she is with her grandparents.

She asks that we call her dad so she can show him the cake she made. She is extremely proud of her creation and she wants her father's validation.

"Hello, Schatzi."

"Uhm, Hey, Khanyi wanted you to have a look at her cake, she was baking with Greta." he nods

"Have you been drinking?" before I could answer, Khanyi comes to my rescue with the cake and starts talking about it. I head to the kitchen to have some water and cucumber.

"Mama, Dad is asking to talk to you." fucking hell, I make my way into the living room and wait for him to talk

"We spoke about this."

"What exactly?"

"You avoiding your feelings by drinking."

"I would not have to avoid them if you were here and we could talk it out."

"Kamo, why are we still..." in walks a lady, blonde hair, lean build with some tone and definition, she looks gorgeous, if I was not in love with Kai over here, I would have a crush on her. "Anya, I am speaking to my wife, can you leave?" this is her? I see why he is attracted to her

"Oh, sorry. Hello, Kamo, pleasure to finally meet you." heavy Slavic accent

"Hi, Anya."

"Well, I will leave you two to it," she says before she makes her way out of the room

"Yeah, Do you share a bed?"

"No, why do you even think like that?"

"Because you like her, Kaiser, how else am I supposed to process you telling me that about another woman?"

"Not like this."

"I am not having this conversation with you," I say before ending the call, why is he like this?

She is everything I wish I was and all I want to be, besides being white and blond, she can keep that. I gave birth to his children and I have taken bullets for him, can she say she did that? Of course not!

Fuck him.

******

I feel like she is overreacting but is it Kamo if she does not overreact?