Demi's camp getaway

Chapter 31

A secret good bye

Hayleys POV
I'd been sitting by the lake for about half an hour. The lake was across from the lobbies so Demi could keep an eye on me and I can still be alone.
I knew she'd follow me if I didn't stay in her view.

I felt angry. I felt so misunderstood and frustrated. I need time to myself to calm down and get myself together. But I do understand why she worries so much about me. I kept checking the time.
12:53
I was counting down the minutes. I wanted to call at 1pm on the dot. I kept turning around and watching behind me to make sure I didn't get caught.
When 1 pm hit I dialled the number. My hands shaking, I hadn't pressed call yet. Maybe I was being to rash? Maybe I should sleep on it.. give myself some time. She might not even want to speak to me. She gave me up. She hurt me. I didn't even know what she was in jail for. I needed to do this. Maybe she's changed her mind and regretted what she did.

In the end, I couldn't do it. I turned my phone off and put it back in my pocket. I wasn't strong enough. I wasn't ready. I put my head down and started sobbing uncontrollably into my hands. That was the closet I'd ever been to my mother and it was me keeping us apart now. I had to much going on now but I was determined to go through with it when I was ready.
I saved the number in my phone and wrote the call hours into my notes. I rested my hands in my lap and looked out into the lake.
I started thinking about the race. Where I had seen Noah kissing Abigail. Where my friends and I won. And.. well. When I got Demi back.

Ring ring

I jumped. Damn it! My phone always rings and gets me off guard. I wiped my tears away.
"Hello?" I answered the phone still sounding nasally
"Hayley!" It was Rebecca and Casey!
"OMG you guys! I was worried"
"We are SO sorry we were working when you called!"
"Oh.. that's okay"
"Are you okay? You sound like you've been crying?"
"No no, I've just got a cold.."
"Aw that sucks! But you'll still be up for coming tomorrow??"
"What tomorrow??"
"Yes girl! We can see you tomorrow!"
"Oh um. That soon? Look I still have 2 weeks left I-"
"Hayley. I dont know how you would get here any other way. This is the easiest and safest way for you to get to us. And we miss you! We don't wanna wait another 2 weeks"
I thought about what they were saying. And it made sense.. and it's not that I didn't want to see them. It's that.. I knew when I left..  I would never see Demi again. And that broke my heart.
"Hayley?"
"Oh sorry. I was just thinking"
"So we'll see you tomorrow?!"
"Yeah.. I guess so"

"Hayley!" I turned around to see Demi waving me over.

"Oh hey I got to go girls, send me the details please!"
We said bye then I hung up and ran over to Demi
"What?" I said annoyed
"You've been there for a while. We need to go to our next activity.. or do you want to sit out.. I understand if you need some time." She said
"Demi. I don't want to be mad at you right now" I muttered, and it was true. Even though I was a little mad at her. I couldn't spend my last day being mad at her. I looked up at her and she was giving me a small smile. "Can we do something together instead?" I asked hesitantly.
"Aw Hunny. I want to and that's so sweet you asked but I promised Kirra I'd spend some one on one time with her. But tomorrow we can!" She chirped.
Fuck you kirra.
"Oh.. um. No that's okay" I said looking at my feet trying to act unbothered.
"Hey what's wrong" Demi lowered her voice and put a comforting hand on my shoulder.
"I'll just miss you" I shrugged. I saw her facial expression change. Her eyes went watery and her posture hunched as if a heart ache. "You'll be okay" she smiled.
You'll be okay? Ouch..
I gave her an awkward smile and went inside and walked into my room. I had about 10 minutes till morning tea was over.

I felt so hurt. There is so many things going on in my head right now. I have access to talk to my mum. I just learned my dad is gone. Demi doesn't care about me. I'm reuniting with Casey and Rebecca.. and I'll never see Demi again.. I found myself in the bathroom again. Looking at the razor..
no. I won't do it.
Instead I did what my psychologist suggested. I went over to my bag and grabbed out my journal. I had only wrote in this thing one since I'd been here. In the orphanage I wrote in it all the time, but I've been to occupied here and don't get much time or privacy to write in it. Casey and Rebecca knew I had it and I trusted them. But I'd never write in it in front of people I didn't really know.
I stared at the little wrinkles all over the pink leather covering the book. There was dirt and dust in between every fine line. I opened it and slowly flipped through every page. I stopped on one page.. it had water marks from crying. As most pages did. It was one casey and Rebecca had written, reminding me how much they loved me and how much I mean to them. A tear rolled down my cheek and on to the page, it was so sweet. I loved those girls like family. They were family.