L:
"Shit..." I mumble as I repeatedly start to punch the steering wheel as hard as I can.
I can't believe it. I can't believe how easily I can just mess shit up.
Like, there we were- getting it together and actually bonding. For a second, she wasn't just the mother of my unborn children, she was a woman I could see a real future with. It was almost like all of the confusion, the awkwardness and the undeniable tension had diminished.
Stepping out into the parking garage, I slam the car door, still cussing quietly. I hurry down the aisle, jumping onto the elevator to shoot up to the fifteenth floor.
"Merry Christmas, Lindsey." One of the older ladies that lives just down the hall greets me the moment I step into hallway.
"Merry Christmas, Linda." I give her a smile as I move towards my condo door.
Pushing it open, I toss my keys down on the stand. It's pretty quiet, which is almost abnormal. There's usually loud music, or the tv is at full volume, or some other bullshit like that.
"Cassie?" I crease a brow as I slowly trail through the condo.
"Lindsey, look!" She pops up out of nowhere, holding a little stick in her hand. "I'm pregnant!" She almost shouts as tears immediately start to fall down her cheeks.
~~~
S:
The following week is a little hectic, more so than normal.
My parents pack up and leave a few days after Christmas, promising that they'd be back before I give birth. Bridget also leaves to head out to New Jersey for a full week of partying under the boardwalk. And Betsy even calls me, probably not all that willingly, but she still calls.
She asks if I want to go out to lunch to talk about everything that's happened in the last few months. Of course, I agree, but I'm still a little unsure about my true feelings. That was the most evil thing she ever could have done, especially since these babies didn't ask for this. They didn't ask to be brought here, and for her to act so insane is still totally beyond me.
"Why are you such a difficult woman?" Sharon asks as she begins to deal the deck of cards amongst the table.
Since I can't necessarily go crazy this New Years Eve, my wonderful friends all decided to spend their evening with me, gossiping and drinking wine... Oh, how jealous I truly am.
"I'm not difficult. I'm realistic." I shrug as I start to look through my cards. I have a crappy hand... shocking.
"So let me get this straight," Minnie sits forward, a small smirk on her face. "You guys were dancing, it was getting romantic and then you just kicked him out?" She laughs softly and so do the other girls.
"That's not what I did," I roll my eyes, a huff immediately escaping me. "His girlfriend called.... I couldn't just naturally assume that he'd want to hang out here." That's true.
I wasn't going to set myself up for failure- I'm too old for that sort of stuff.
"Ladies, he was so nice, really." Lori slides into the dining room, holding up another bottle of wine. "I brought this for you." She giggles, setting a wine glass full of grape juice down on my coaster.
"I'm sure he was, but Stevie likes to be difficult... like I said." Sharon raises an eyebrow, almost like I'm intentionally being 'difficult.'
They just don't understand, none of them do. This isn't just some game of 'house'- no, this is real life. I'm really going to have this mans children, and I still don't know him like I wish I did.
I don't necessarily think he's a liar, but I do think that he hasn't been completely honest with me, and that's just not okay. They've never been in a situation like this, so I know it's probably easy to give advice that seems useful.
"I'm sure you have plenty of reasons to be a little standoffish." Minnie reaches over, giving my hand a soft squeeze.
"I'm telling you, he has a girlfriend." I throw my head back, letting out a loud laugh at how crazy these women really are.
They don't believe me when I tell them that he isn't all that available, and that just pisses me off, but it's still a little funny.
"So you think," Lori smirks, bringing her glass of red wine up to her lips. "Just give him a chance; maybe he has a good explanation." She adds with a shrug of her shoulders.
My hands fall on the table, and then I push myself out of the chair. "I'm hungry," I announce with a light smile.
"Will you get me whatever you're getting?" Minnie shouts softly, which causes us all to laugh a little more.
~
It's early in the afternoon when I find myself sitting at a table, waiting for Betsy. She's a little late, and for a moment I wonder if she's even going to show up, but than I realize that she wouldn't do that. She might be mad at me, but she would not embarrass me like that, ever.
And I'm right- only a couple of minutes later, she falls into a chair across from me.
She looks tired, probably because she went out last night with Adam and a couple of his friends. I only know that, because Bridget told me... Lord knows Betsy would never call to check in like that. I could be dying and she would let all the calls go straight to voicemail. That's terrible, but it's true.
"Hi, honey." I'm happy to see her, even if she isn't all that thrilled to see me.
"Hey," She lets off a gentle smile, "How are you?" She asks.
"I'm doing alright, how are you?" This is the most we've talked in months, which makes me a little more thankful for this afternoon.
She starts talking about the passed couple of weeks and how life has gone for her. It seems pretty normal- school, work and weekends spent at home with Adam. I'm happy to know that she's able to tell me these things again, because I've actually missed it. I've missed her calls, her visits and I even missed all of her drama- I'm happy to know some of it's back.
"Betsy, I have a question and this might be too soon, but I really need to ask." I've been thinking about this a lot, and I don't anyone else besides her and Lori for this sort of job.
"What is it?" She looks up from her plate, eyes meeting mine.
"Since I'm older, there is a higher risk for this pregnancy..." I don't know how to tell her that I'm afraid. "If something were to happen to me, I would want you to have one of the babies." I already know one would go to Lori, and even though it's wrong to split them up- it's probably for the best. "And that's only given if Lindsey wouldn't be able to care for them, of course." I assure, trying to make it sound a little more hopeful.
"Of course, mom."
