S:
"Stop it!" Lori does that laugh that's so brutal, it sounds like a horse is squealing... or choking.
"You were actually going to get married?" Mary creases a brow, leaning back in her chair to process all the stuff I just laid on them.
"Vic was cute though," Minnie shrugs, giving me a gentle wink.
"Shh," I hold a finger to my lips, glancing around the corner at the twins, who are both far too interested in the cars and Barbie dolls. "I don't want them to know what's going on until we have it all somewhat put together." I sigh softly, happy but also really conflicted.
I want to give them what's best and I think two parents together would thrill them. Hell, the idea just thrills me. But I don't want to just jump right into something so complex, especially not with them. They're young and I'm almost certain they'll ask a zillion questions about Tammy, Vic, and even about their daddy and I. Until I know that Lindsey plans on being my one and only- I can't just bombard them with hope and then rip it away.
If anyone has been rooting for Lindsey and I to be together, it's been our two babies, so I want this to be fair. Their happiness will always mean the world to me, which is why I plan to tell them that Lindsey and I are a thing when I know we can make it work.
"Have you even talked to Vic?" Lori suddenly isn't laughing all that much- now she just looks concerned.
Biting down on my bottom lip, I let another sigh escape me. "I called him this morning and just told him that something came up with one of the kids..." That sounds awful- I know it does, but I couldn't tell him over the phone.
"What about Tammy?" Mary asks, which causes me to smile softly. She's always been the more in depth, realistic one, and most of the time I need that.
"Lindsey's going to talk to her," I shrug, hands moving out to my sides gently. "And I trust him when he says that." I assure, just because I can already sense the next question- how do you know he really will?
I really do trust him. I trust him when he tells me that he loves me and that he wants to start a life like a real family. He's genuine- I know he is. And they can think whatever they want- Vic might be good looking, charming and even fully retired, but he isn't the person that I'm really in love with.
"When are you going to talk to Vic about it?" Minnie brings her glass of wine up her lips to take a sip.
"I invited him over tonight," I reply, nodding my head gently.
It's not that I wanted to invite him to my home, but I couldn't imagine how awkward it would be if we were sitting at restaurant, talking about how I'm desperately in love with another man. I can't do that to him, even if I don't love him. It's still not fair, because he did treat me well.
~~~
L:
Sitting across from her in the booth, my eyes continuously roam from her face towards the menu, and then off into the sea of people in the restaurant. I've never been all that good at breaking up with someone, never. But I find this a lot more settling knowing that there's a bright light waiting for me at the end- Stevie and our two kids.
"So? Did you have a good evening last night with the kids?" Tammy looks up from her meal, eyes almost wide... too wide. Crazy eyes.
