Psychotic Love (a mafia love story)

Chapter 54

LUCA'S POV

I hold Echo's hand in mine as she lies in a hospital bed with a tube down her throat. Her eyes are swollen and purple. Bruises, some in the shape of hands are plastered on her body. She has quite a few cuts and scratches on her body too. I can't even imagine the type of pain she was going through.

I found out she was pregnant a little while after they brought her in. She had blood running down her thighs that's the way they knew. The thought of how she may have gotten pregnant is loathsome. Visions of her assaults beam through my vision every second of the day. I am going to make Arturo feel every ounce of the pain she did, right before burning him alive. I have to get revenge for her. I have to.

Looking at her brings an ineffable amount of guilt. I did this to her. It's my fault she was taken in the first place. I shouldn't have brought her into my life. She was right, I did nothing but ruin her.

I may not have put these bruises on her, I may not have beaten her, but I've...I've killed her. She's gone and there's not a thing on earth that could bring her back to me. Knowing that will be my demise. It's eating me up. I never thought someone's death would weigh this heavily on me.

The doctors have told me it's time to let go. She told me too, but I don't want to. I can't let her go, because then it'll all be too real. She'll really be gone.

She's not even breathing on her own and she's coded three times in her four days of being here. Each time my heart threatens to stop beating with hers.

I know she doesn't want to be here. And I feel selfish for making her stay so I've decided to take her off life support in three days. I won't make her suffer any longer. I've already done it during her life, I won't do it in death too. I'll let her go.

I bring her hand to my lips and give her a soft kiss. "I know you're tired baby, but if you can...please just give it one more fight. Come back to me." Why the hell would she even want to come back to me? I made her life miserable. I'm not worth her fighting for.

I place her hand back on the bed and place a kiss on her forehead. If she lets go, I won't be upset. I know it's what she wants. I'll miss her though. Every fucking day. I'll miss that sweet smile and that kind heart that I took for granted. I'll miss her soothing laugh and her voice that ran smoother than silk. I'll miss those beautiful honey-brown eyes. They lit up my heart. I smile as a tear rolls down my cheek at the memory of her at the art gallery. She said I was her special someone. I wish I would have done things differently.

In the short time we had together, she became my world. I wish I could've shown her that. Enough of I wish, there are no wishes. My heart is gone and I deserve to feel this pain. I deserve to rot. If I suffer in the loss of her for the rest of my life, I deserve it. And she deserves peace, that's why I'm letting her go, for once I'll put my feelings aside and let Echo go.