Nesert

1.16

(bold from Episode 7.16 "Death Knell")

It was decided that Rak'nor would be a good addition to their party as he was already well known to Sekhmet's jaffa and widely respected. He resisted initially, not wanting to deceive his brethren, but Teal'c encouraged him to see the mission as helping free the Jaffa from more false gods, particularly Apophis, who was certainly their greatest threat. Sometimes deception was necessary in war.

"I don't know if I can do this." Rak'nor had come up next to his former goddess as she stared out the window of the Tok'ra ship.

"You can. You will." She turned to look at him, but her eyes were cold. "You'll tell yourself that your lies are to save them from greater lies." She again looked out the window. "If you feel any sympathy for those you are hurting for their own good, you'll never be able to do what's necessary. You must decide between caring and helping."

"Is that what you've done?" Rak'nor's voice still held the respect he'd given as her slave. making her despise every word he spoke, but Sekhmet's laugh echoed through the room.

"I doubt I care or help anymore."

The laughter felt good. At least as Sekhmet, she knew who she was. She knew her past, her role in the worlds she inhabited, her needs, her goals, her friends, and her enemies. But as Tessa...no, she wasn't Tessa. Tessa was gone. Tessa was dead. That much she knew. The old Tessa didn't exist anymore. She died by a thousand cuts along the way.

"I thought you were trying to be Tessa again. You said you weren't Sekhmet." Rak'nor shouldn't care, but perhaps he thought her salvation meant his was attainable as well.

"I simply dug up Tessa's body and wore her skin for a while. She was a ghost and it was foolish to think I could be her. She's buried again." She kept her body stiff, imagining that grief, like her previous pain, required movement to hurt.

"Who are you then?"

"I don't know. I'm not Tessa. I'm not Sekhmet. Maybe a mix of the two or something new entirely." She shrugged. "I don't have a name for who I am."

They were silent for a moment before Rak'nor quietly spoke. "Then pick one."

"Pick one? Like fruit off a tree?"

"Why not? There must be one you like."

She thought back on her memories, searching for a name, but wandered into Sekhmet's instead, drawn to her life more than the one she would have lived on her own.

"Nesert."

When she glanced at him, Rak'nor's eyebrows had raised, waiting for an explanation.

"The Flame. It was one of Sekhmet's old names, depicting her as the heat of the midday sun, scorching, searing...burning." Her voice took on an edge. "Sekhmet may have burned away Tessa, but then I burned away Sekhmet."

She was the flame, burning all who came near, and she let her eyes flash, baptizing her with the chosen name.

"Nesert." Rak'nor let it roll off his tongue and looked over her face. "It fits."

***

They were able to locate the small number of ships that had hidden themselves away, following instructions from their goddess when she had been summoned to Heru'ur. The jaffa and slaves aboard seemed pleased to see she had survived, which surprised the newly christened Nesert. She had not been a particularly kind or gracious ruler, having to follow in Sekhmet's path, but perhaps she had allowed Tessa to shine through at times.

Rak'nor had indeed been a wise addition as he was readily followed by the jaffa he had led only a short while ago. His influence also helped incorporate both Delek and Ocker into the fleet, posing as goa'uld who had been under Heru'ur and sought revenge on Apophis as well.