A Love Bargain

043: Apologies and promises

Pearl

"Please don't leave me, Pearl. I am so sorry baby," his soft deep voice lingered in my ears. Baby? The inside of my body melted at that. "I am sorry for not giving you a chance to speak your truth, for every single thing I said to you. For ignoring your calls and texts, please do forgive me..." He paused and then, silence fell through.

My breath hitched in my throat and my heartbeat slowed down a bit but once again, it started throbbing loudly against my chest. I could feel his heart pound against me, and his arms firmly held onto my waist not ready to loosen around it. 

It was as if he was scared I would pull away from him. If only he noticed my hand that travelled halfway to his waist, before falling back to my side. Should I do it or not? The question lingered in my mind as I struggled to balance the bad and good feelings burning in me.

I wanted to hold him too, so bad but I could still feel a little pain slice through me.

"I..." He finally broke the silence, "I was miserable the past two weeks without you, and with each day passing it got worse. I wanted to reply to your text, to call you, to come back for you but I let anger take the better part of me, turning me into a coward. There was never a day I did not think about you, Pearl. About us."

The info he was dumping on me, like magic loosened the remaining anger knot in my stomach, and again my right hand travelled up to his waist and this time I held onto his shirt.

I had thought about him every single day too, and I understood it was going to be hard for him to trust me, especially after what happened with his ex. But I still wished we communicated, that he had listened and believed my side of the story.

I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but we would have to take it one step at a time. I was ready to be patient with him, all I needed was for him to be able to always communicate with me. 

"I am not sure I can live without you, Pearl." He said, and those words caused my heart to palpitate with multiple feelings that awakened in me. "No, I am sure that I can't live without you," He added and I could hear a lump pass through his throat. "I am scared to try again, but I want to try with you. I had stopped believing in love until you showed up in my life, and suddenly, I began feeling things I hadn't felt for anyone before. You make me happy—just the thought of you makes my heart happy. As long as it's you, I want to try love again. Only with you do I want to know what it's like to love someone again. So, would you let me love you, Pearl?"

Jelly feeling possessed my knee and goosebumps spread all through my body. Before I knew it, my arms snaked around his waist, comfortably. 

All these he said, while hugging me to his pounding heart, which was beating for me, just like mine was beating for him.

Our hearts were beating for each other.

"I want to look you in the eyes and say those words all over again," he said, loosening his arms around me and I did the same.

He pulled away from me, but our bodies were so close that I could still hear his heartbeat loud and clear. His eyes danced around my face and as I directed mine away from his, he gently pulled my face up to meet him. 

"Look at me," he drawled and I gulped, settling my tired eyes into his burning gaze.

"I am sorry for making you cry," his breath fanned my face and mine hitched in my throat. I blinked my teary tired eyes. "I meant every single word I just said." I could see his honesty vividly in his strong gaze, and all I could think of was to kiss his lips and snuggle up his big frame. 

I wanted to say something but I didn't know what to say, or where to start. His hand left my chin and rested on the side of my face, with his thumb, he started wiping wetness off my face and I slightly moved my face in his large palm, taking in his scent.