The Right Side of Wrong

B.I.T.C.H.

Veronica's POV:

Today, per Ivy's instructions, the L.O.D. is replacing all the male trees in Gotham with female trees while Tawny interviews Ivy & Joker.

Tawny: "We're live with the mayor and Poison Ivy. Girl, what the heck is going on?"

Ivy: "Oh, girl.-*clears throat*-Um, so I'm, uh, leading an initiative to replace all the male trees in Gotham with female trees."

Tawny: "Big J, as a male, are you gonna stand for that?"

Joker: "Of course, Tawny. It's female trees that produce fruit, and free fruit for the people is peachy keen.-*laughs*-But since this is a co-pro with the Legion of Doom, I'd appreciate a heads-up on what the evil twist is."

Tawny: "Ooh, Ivy, give us the juice with extra pulp."

Ivy: "No twist. You know, we're just a corporation endearing itself to the city. So, whoo!"

Joker: "You can't leave me out of the twist! I'm the mayor."

Joker walks away as Harley pushes her way to the front of the crowd.

Harley: "Ivy! Yo!"

Nora: "Ivy's not visiting with spectators."

Harley: "Nora, it's me. Come on, Harley, the person who convinced you not to get a neck tattoo that said 'queef queen'."

Nora: "I don't see you on the list."

Harley: "That's a Mama Macaroni's takeout menu. Wait, Garlic Knubs are back? Ivy, Mama Mac's for date night?"

Me: "Harley!"

Harley turns and rushes to hug me.

Harley: "Ronnie! Ugh! How is this the first time we've seen each other in person since you got back?"

Me: "I'm guessing it has something to do with them."

Nightwing breaks us up as if on cue with a stern glare toward Harley as Batgirl & Robin appear beside him.

Nightwing: "What are you d-No. You can't hug villains. Why are you even at an LOD event?"

Harley: "I am here romantically and sisterly, not professionally, but I've got my crimey eyes wide open, ok? I just gave a very menacing look to a guy who almost littered. I am totally representing the Fam. See?"

Harley steps to the side to show off her new suit.

Nightwing: "You have to earn your bat outfit. You can't just go buy one at a Halloween store."

Harley: "Well, this is from a sex shop, ok?"

Nightwing: "Not ok. I'm getting texts about you when we were this close to luring Drunkula out of his coffin."

Batgirl: "You know, this is on us for never properly training you."

Harley: "Oh, cool, cool, ok. Am I gonna train with a pack of wolves? Take a vow of silence and live with monks in the mountains learning to gossip nonverbally?"

Me: "Either way, I know you're gonna kill it. I gotta regroup with the LOD, but I'll call you later."

Harley: "Got it. See ya, sis!"

{Time skip}

Ivy: "Now that Operation Lady Trees has begun, let's discuss the evil twist."