Good Omens Oneshots

The Serpent

Back when sunglasses were created, that was the best day of Crowleys life. He had always hated his eyes back then. And it worked out because he had to hide them anyway. Because the humans in that time often tries to excorsize him. Now, they just assumed he tattooed his eye or just had weird genetics of some sort.

     Crowley used to be quite insecure about his eyes. He didn't like how they looked. So, even though sunglasses had just been created and were very expensive he quickly bought some. 

     Aziraphale, though, did not like the sunglasses very much. He had a secret love of the serpents eyes. He thought they were quite unique and beautiful. Of course, he never said this to the demon. Until it was necessary. 

     "Crowley, why are you wearing that new invention thingy." Aziraphale asked Crowley from the other side of the bar. 

     "They are called sunglasses. And I find them quite fashionable." Crowley lied. He thought the first edition of sunglasses looked quite odd, but anything to cover his eyes.

     "I highly doubt you think those things are fashionable, dear." Aziraphale protested. "You wouldn't take that shash I offered you a hundred years ago because 'women don't find that color fashionable'."

     Crowley made faces as she tried to think of what to say, "Fine. This is the ugliest thing I've ever put on my face." 

     Aziraphale stood, and pointed at the demon, "Aha! I was right!" 

     "Seriously?" Crowley said with a flash of judgment at the Angel.

     "Your right," The Angel sat back down on the uncomfortable stool, still smiling at his acknowledgement, "I apologize." 

      Crowley rolled his eyes. 

      "If you find them ugly, then why do you wear them?" Aziraphale said, taking a sip and quickly spitting it out, forgetting how disgusting the drink was.

      "Uhm." Crowley mumbled uncomfortably, "Shit, uhm. Fine I don't like my eyeballs." 

      "Why not, I think they're quite–" Aziraphale cut himself off, "Nice." 

      Crowley looked at the Angel suspiciously and went back to sipping on his own disgusting drink. She mumbled to herself, "These people make the worst drinks." 

       "Hm?" 

       "What? Oh! Right." Crowley grumbled, "I just don't like them." 

      "Do they make you insecure?" Aziraphale asked the question with no hesitance.

      Crowley spit out his drink and whisper yelled, "You can't-Thats not a question you just ask someone nonchalantly." 

     Aziraphale looked at the demon intently, "Crowley, your eyes are nothing to be insecure about. They are beautiful." 

     Crowley didn't answer as she leaned forward, slouching quite a bit. 

     

From then on, he continued to hide her eyes from the human civilization. But whenever he saw the Angel, he would then, and only then take off his glasses. 

     For he didn't want the Angel to worry he still was. But the demon wasn't insecure of anything (that's a lie) so he had nothing to worry about.