The hardest part of getting sober was the way Spencer was affected mentally. He could feel his mental health slipping, yet he refused to let it stop him. He still went to work and did his best. When he got home, he would clean another section of his apartment. Y/N had told him to stretch out cleaning it as far as he could so that he could feel good about something every day. On days he couldn't do anything but sit in bed, Y/N would come over and make him small meals and bring him water.
Every Thursday, if he wasn't gone on a case, Y/N would drop him off at meetings. They helped. He learned to live with the hunger. The soul devouring cravings subsided, became an annoying but ignorable urge that lingered in the back of his mind. Spencer started to gain weight back, and was sleeping better. After a few months of meetings and encouragement, he was as close to normal as he could get.
The team noticed that he was getting better. He knew they knew about the Dilaudid, but they never said anything . It kind of stung, thinking about how they knew but didn't help. Maybe they didn't want to bring attention to it for fear of someone finding out and firing him. Whatever the case, it hurt.
Spencer was five months sober the next time Y/N did a full check up. "Hey, Spence." They were at the coffee shop. Y/N was looking anywhere but him, hiding her eyes behind sunglasses. "You still clean?" He nodded. She had been distant. Of course, Spencer figured one would be distance with someone who left them for drugs, but this was different. She was still in pain.
"Are you still mad at me?" He asked softly. She looked down at her coffee. Back at him. Over at the door. Her avoidance to the question was all the answer he needed. Spencer watched her continue to avoid his gaze. "I got clean for you, I don't understand," he huffed. "Spencer you need to get clean for you. Not me. This was never about me." She gathered her things and stood. "Until you understand that, I'm going to be mad."
He watched as a tear slid down her cheek from under the sunglasses. "Why have you been helping me?" She sighed. "You can care about someone and still be angry, Spencer. I'll see you around." And then she was gone.
YOU ARE READING
Neighbors (Spencer Reid x Reader)
FanfictionVERY LOOSELY FOLLOWS THE STORYLINE BUT IS MOSTLY OUTSIDE THE BAU Having Y/N has a neighbor was an experience. Spencer thought he hated you, but as time passed he found it was something else. As the two of you try to sort through a mess of emotions...
