Smoke Signals

6 ⚠️

⚠️ SELF HARM ⚠️

I was back home standing in my bathroom, the blade of the knife pressed firmly against the skin of my wrist. I quickly dragged it across and smiled when I saw the blood start pooling. God it was good to feel that again.

JJ greeted me when she got to the office by handing me a cup of coffee. When I grabbed it my sleeve slid down a bit and she saw the bandage on my wrist. "What happened?" She asked.

"Long story." I pulled my sleeve back down.

"What's the story?"

"I uh...forgot my big knife was in the sink and there was water in it so I couldn't see and I cut it." I said after a few seconds.

"So it was an accident?"

"Yeah." I nodded. "Why?"

"I just want to make sure you're keeping yourself safe." I scoffed.

"When I have this job?"

"Slitting your wrists and hunting down serial killers are two very different things." She said.

"Sorry."

"So, it 100% was an accident." I hesitated for a second. I didn't like lying to her and I couldn't say it out loud again so I just nodded. She turned around and walked away. I took a sip of the coffee and got to work.

I left the building for lunch and just walked around a little bit, eating nothing but a muffin. I turned my phone off so I could just be alone with my thoughts. That wasn't always a good idea, but who cares. You gotta live life on the edge. "Blair!" I heard a familiar voice and looked behind me. It was JJ.

"Hi."

"Hey. Sorry, I just saw you...I didn't want to be alone."

"Ok." I nodded and kept walking.

"You ok?"

"Yeah."

"You sure?"

"Can you stop asking?"

"Sorry." We were about a block away from the office and I really wanted to be alone right now. No matter how much I cared and adored JJ. "Hey, I was wondering if you were free for dinner tonight?" I shrugged.

"I don't know."

"You don't know?" I sighed and stopped walking. "If you don't want to go out just say so."

"I don't not want to go out. But I don't want to go out. I don't know how I'm going to feel later in the day."

"Ok, well do you just wanna come over to my place?"

"I don't know JJ, ok?"

"Blair-"

"Can you please let me breathe for a second?" I could hear her hold her breath. "Girl you can still breathe you know."

"I know." We walked through the doors and went up the elevator.

"Why are you so insistent on having dinner with me anyways?"

"I need to talk to you about something."

"Talk to me here."

"Well...it's about you."

"I don't wanna talk about me."

"Well I was trying to corner you." She admitted. I smiled. "What?"

"Nothing you're just...you're cute." She blushed.

"Thanks." The elevator door opened and we both stepped out. "But Blair I seriously do want to talk to you."

"Right now?"

"It doesn't have to be right now."

"Ok. Then can we wait?"

"Yeah."

"Is it going to be a free therapy session sort of thing?" I tugged at my sleeve and she looked down at it.

"It can be."

"Ok." I looked down at the ground.

"Can you keep me company?"

"Sure. Why?" I asked, following her up to her office. She just shrugged. "Did you miss me?" I joked, just expecting her to laugh and brush it off.

"Yeah. I did." I blushed and felt my heart flutter. I sat down on her couch and made myself comfortable. I saw her staring at me out of the corner of my eye, looking a bit sad.

"You ok?" I asked her. She nodded. "JJ-"

"If you don't talk to me about things I'm not talking to you about anything." My brows furrowed. What did she mean?

"I do tell you things. Nobody else knows about my dad...or my eye." She stayed quiet. "I'm sorry did I miss something?"

"No."

"Ok. I'm a little lost here."

"Yeah. Me too." I sighed and lied down on my back, staring at the ceiling. "Blair?"

"Hm?" I continued to stare at the ceiling.

"I care about you."

"Ok. Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I want you to know."

"Oh. I care about you too." I played with my fingers and tried to hide my blush.

"I don't want you to get hurt."

"Ok?" I was really confused right now.

"Stay safe. Please."

"Ok. You do the same."

"I will."