Smoke Signals

36 ⚠️

⚠️ ABUSE ⚠️

JJ knelt down in front of me at the foot of the bed, looking at me with sympathetic eyes. She had found me crying and of course, wanted to help.

She put her hands on my thighs and rubbed them soothingly, looking up at me. "Wanna talk about it?" I shook my head and she stood up, bringing my head to slowly rest on her stomach. She rubbed my back soothingly as I silently cried against her. "It's ok." She whispered. "It's ok, I'm here."

"Can you hold me?" She nodded and I stood up, she put her ams around me protectively as if she were shielding me from everything bad in the world.

Once I stopped crying I rested my forehead against hers and she held my face in her hands, wiping the tears away. "I love you." She whispered, my lips started to tremble again. "It's ok my love, it's ok." She caressed my cheeks and looked into my eyes lovingly.

I could tell from the look in her eyes that she knew what was wrong. "He's not here sweetheart."

"I know." She kissed my forehead.

"It's not your fault." She whispered. "It's not."

"I know."

"It's not your fault." She tucked my hair behind my ears. "It's not your fault."

"Why do you keep saying that?"

"Because it's not your fault." My lip trembled and another tear fell down my cheek. "I need you to know that honey." She said softly, wiping the tear away. "Because none of it was your fault. No one deserves what happened to you. No one. It's. Not. Your. Fault."

"But I could've gone sooner, I could've fought back, I could've done anything other than let him do it." I sniffled. "And now I have this." I mumbled, pointing to my left eye. She shook her head, kissing the corner of my eye.

"It's beautiful baby. You're beautiful."

"Everyone always thinks I'm half blind and every time I meet someone new they always stare at it and I know how I got it and I know I could've prevented it." I took in a shaky breath.

"It's not your fault. And that scar, that scar is a shows how brave you are."

"But-"

"Yes, you could've left earlier honey. But you're going to kill yourself with the what ifs, alright? What's done is done and you're here now, working for the FBI, saving people's lives." She said with a soft smile, taking her forehead off of mine so she could see my face better.

I looked at her with watery eyes. "How many people can say that they pulled themselves out of your situation to make a better life for themselves?"

"I don't know." I mumbled.

"Not a lot honey. But you're one of them. That takes so much courage, standing up to someone who hurts you continuously but who you love so much. That takes courage." She kissed my forehead and I smiled slightly. "You are so brave honey. Never doubt that." I pulled her into another hug and she put her hand on the back of my head, holding me protectively. "I got you." She rubbed my back and kissed my temple.

After five minutes of her just holding me in her arms I took a step back and sat back down on the bed. She sat down next to me and took both of my hands in hers. I rested my head on her shoulder and then her phone vibrated. Mine vibrated right after hers and we both sighed.

I let go of her hands to check me phone and sure enough, we had a case. "Are you gonna be ok? We can tell Hotch we need to sit this one out." She kissed the top of my head.

"I'll be fine."