Jeih's Poems

Birth of Chaos

Back from a long eerie and vivid memory
of violence, destruction and severed bonds.
All my eyes were empty yet curious tiny strands
Of eyelids and my retina viewing a reflection of what was not always portrayed in our society.

Why was I exposed to such physical and emotional quarrels?
why does mom have to carry the chair and smash it to dad.
and why does dad push away my mother and curse her with his words
why?

Is it me?
all I knew that it was about money.
Desire.
and the cravings to nourish by means of even showing their child how we truly are.

As a young adult its not foreign to me when someone asserts their power to get their desires.
Whether be it through tongues of poison honey and iron fists.
the fear it all incorporated in my heart.
As well as the seed of trauma inevitably planted deep inside this brain.

All I know was life is beautiful.
Creation is beautiful.
However chaos was even more glamorous.
the destruction, the end and the spawn of truth from deep inside hearts corrupted by their own beholder.

Its an artpiece.
To see clashes of souls naked and overpowering what they opt to challenge.
To bend the laws that weren't even set in primitive times.
Chaos that defies order and darkness that continues to wander behind all the lights that continues to hover.

You see dear,
I'm not your fairytale husband that's gonna pamper you and spoonfeed everything I have and all that I am.
No.
I am now Chaos that arose from what has been planted in me.

I seek destruction and severing anything created by this universe.
I can love but don't you go daydreaming about sweet honeymoons and luxurious celebrations.
I'll waltz you around from the debts of my own abyss with the heads of those I stepped upon to reach the pinaccle of my desires.
If you want you can stay but you are free to leave as well.

However don't you ever think of imposing what's right for me
because even if I did.
It would never work out.
if we were all born as angels, I was born to deceive those angels.

So yeah I wasn't an angel even when I was born.
I am human and I can disappoint.
It will be either I reach self-enlightenment or self-destruction.
Don't worry one less person on earth wouldn't change anything at all.

Though if I was even one.