I blame you, Charlie, you definitely ruined romance for me. You were my first lover and you gaslighted me into thinking love could only be experienced once. Well it happened for me a few more times than just once, there was you, Roy, Justice, the boy in my new school, and someone I won't mention, yet. I can't seem to get over how you broke my heart, I mean, you were the first person that I truly loved. It was a love that I only found a handful of other times, the kind of love you could only find in Paris.
It's almost as if you jinxed me, or maybe it was that witch that you dated after me; David. After he asked me out he went for you to make me mad because I rejected him. Oh and by the way he cheated on you with Todd. Something about him seemed off, I think he was the one who cursed me, made me incapable of finding true love. My mother always told me that I'm only a kid and that I have an entire life ahead of me to find my true love. The truth is that life is extremely short and I'm the only one who seems to think that. Maybe I should get back with Roy? I have no idea what to do... I mean the love I experienced with him was so eye-opening, and I wasn't even in Paris. No one in my new school likes me either by the way. It's tragic that someone like me who is fueled by the blossoming existence of love cannot find anyone because they all have their own interests... Me, not being one of them. I just want you to know that after everything you have done I forgive you and I don't want to, but I am literally too tired to even be mad anymore. I just want to sleep, and dance under the maroon sky underneath puddles of midnight rain with Roy. Even after everything he has done, I still love him and I wish he would feel the same way, maybe he would love me if we were in Paris.
Like the leaves that fly aimlessly through the seasonal fall air, my anxiety is all over the place, back and forth like a rocking horse. I hope I find love someday, in a place that isn't Paris, but right where I want to find love. I want to find someone to spend my life with here, at home. I would be so happy if the boy with silent stares would love me too. It's almost like everything I touch becomes gray and everyone I look at becomes depressed like the dying trees in the autumn, so beautiful but the reality is that it's decaying slowly, like my peace of mind knowing that Roy is out there living his life while I'm here dreaming about him. Even though he doesn't seem to care, he knows where to find me; Paris in my dreams on midnights like this.
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Midnights Like This
RomanceOur minds work differently at midnight, sometimes we think about what could be, tomorrow. Sometimes we think about what could've been, ages ago. Sometimes we think about what we could do to change to next day, and sometimes there's just no going bac...
