Amnesia (Malum)

Amnesia

He looked at me. "I have no idea who you are" he told me. I looked at the nurse. "Come here" she said, walking into the hallway. I followed her. "Michael woke up about 30 minutes ago with amnesia. He doesn't remember anyone except his mother and a boy he knows named Luke." she explained. "Luke. His best friend." i nodded.

"Yeah. Luke is on his way. He told us to call you." she said. I nodded. More tears were slowly going down my face. "But, theres like a 40% chance he's gonna remember the important people in his life. Luke said you're pretty important?" she informed me. "What are you to him?" she asked. "I'm his boyfriend." I said. She nodded, writing on a piece of paper.  

"So there's a 40% chance that he'll remember you." she told me. I nodded. I felt sick. I had to go. "I need to, i have to go" I said quietly, shaking my head. She nodded. I went into the bathroom and threw up. I sighed and started crying harder as i flushed the toilet. I didn't know what to do without Michael.

I walked out to michaels car, and drove home slowly, tears blurring my vision the entire time and I didn't care. I eventually made it home and went up to our room, curling up under our big blanket on our bed and crying into a pillow. I didn't know how to handle anything without Michael. I didn't know if I could.

Michael was everything to me, he was the only person that I thought truly cared about me. And now he didn't even know who i was.

I was counting on crying myself to sleep, but I never fell asleep. I just cried until I literally could not cry anymore. Then i layed there stating at the ceiling unseeingly. I was expecting to fall asleep after laying there doing the same thing, but i didn't. I couldn't stop thinking about Michael. The memories we had.

2 am tickle fights, pillow fights, cuddling, me holding him as he cried because he thought Luke hated him, mornings, everything. He couldn't remember any of that. It meant so much to me and he didn't know any of it happened.

And he was probably so confused. He didn't know anyone around him, he didn't know the strangers talking to him. Poor baby.

The way he always messed up pancakes, the way he would get so upset about it. I wanted to cuddle him and kiss him and hear his cute little laugh.

I missed him, and I might never ever have him back. It hurt.

I decided I had to get him back, i had to make him remember me. I had pictures, I had things of his. I had things that he only told me. I knew things he wanted and things he dreamed of. I knew secrets he had only ever told me. I had to make him remember. I could. It would just take work. It would be hard, but it would also be worth it.

I had to at least try. It might not work, but if it didn't, at least I tried as hard as I could. I had to try as hard as I could.

I wanted Michael back, i had to do my best.

I got up, knowing i wasnt gonna be able to sleep. I didnt care that most people were asleep, i didn't care that he hospital probably wouldn't let me in, I didn't care that it was 4 am.

I had to see Michael.