James Marriott's kid

Part 11

Em PoV:
We had just gotten to the trampoline park. It was big!. Ranboo had joined us along with Tubbo and George. It was really cool!. We watched the safety video and then we walked out to the trampoline park. The others kinda hesitated but i ran to the trampolines. I ran down the long one and did a backhand-spring. "WOAH! Em your so good!" Tom shouted. "Hey i can do better than that!" Tubbo said. He went to the trampoline and did a back flip "Tubbo! I can do better than that" i said. I then did a double back twist. "Ha! Take that!" I said jokingly. We were all running around and jumping. It was fun until i jumped to do a flip and Tom ran below me. "TOM! WATCH OUT!" I said. Tom tripped and i failed my flip. It hurt my back but i was more worried about Tom. "Tom! Are you okay?" I said frantically sitting next to me. "I'm good. Are you okay kiddo?" He asked, "I'm fine" that was a lie. My back was in fucking agony but i couldn't ruin another vlog! I helped Tom up. "Sorry ems. I didn't mean to get in your way" Tom said messing with my hair. "Hey it's fine" i said. We continued. My back hurt more and more. "I'm gonna go to the toilet" i said. I walked off to the toilet. I looked in the mirror and lifted up my shirt. Fuck! There was a massive bruise all over it. "Fuck!" I said to myself. Ugh! Why do i always get hurt or pass out or something! Why me? I thought. I was getting angry again...i refrained from punching the wall. I left the toilet and checked no one was around. Once it was clear i walked back to the changing rooms. I sat down on one of the benches and cried. It was always me. ALWAYS! I've had a traumatic past and it was still no better. Okay admittedly James didn't abuse me but i seemed to abuse myself. I couldn't take it. Wouldn't it just be easier if i didn't exist? I've spent 15 years behind a punching bag to some else's problems. And now I'm my own punching back bag. My anxiety was triggered. My leg began shaking. I began to give myself butterfly hugs hoping i would calm down and reason with myself. I closed my eyes tear still streaming from them. "Hey? Are you okay?" Someone asked. "I'm fine" i didn't dare see who it was. "Emily are you sure?" I recognised the voice, Ranboo. I opened my eyes and looked at him. I began fidgeting with my fingers. "I'm fine ran, thanks" i said. "You sure?" He asked again. "Yea. Why are you out here?" I asked, "i came to find you. You've been gone nearly 30 minutes." He said. "Oh sorry, i don't think I'm going to come back in." I said. "That's okay. You don't have to. As long as your okay" he said standing up. "Thanks" i mumbled. He walked back in. Soon after James came out! Fuck! He's the last person i wanted to see. "Ems. Darling.." James said. "What's wrong? And dont say nothing. I know somethings wrong just talk to me! I'm getting worried." He said. "James I'm fine please. Leave it!" I said. I went to walk away but he grabbed my arm. "Emily. Speak to me" he looked me dead in the eyes. I gave in. "It's just...it's always me that gets hurt or ruins everything...WHY is it always me! What's did i do to deserve it?" I said crying again. "Ems..it's not always you..you've not ruined anything and you have will" he said. "It is always me, how come earlier when Tom got in my way he was fine but i wasn't!" I said. "Ems what do you mean. You said you were good..did you get hurt?" He asked looking me up and down . "Yea but I'm okay...it's nothing. Honest" i said. "Em where did you get hurt?" He asked. I lifted up me shirt and turned around. "Emily! Oh darling" he said. "Your back..oh love" he pulled me into a hug. I'm not sure he knew what to say... "it's fine. I don't wanna be fussed over! IM SICK OF IT!" i pushed James away, "IM FUCKING SICK OF YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE TREATING ME LIKE A KID! IM 15 I CAN DEAL WITH IT MYSELF! YOU DONT NEED TO FUSS OVER ME!" I walked off. I left the building. James was calling my name. I got a bus and left.. wasn't sure where. Just left. Like before...i got to a bridge. I was prepared. I felt like James deserved an answer . He deserves to know and so the others...i began to think about what to say.