James Marriott's kid

Part 17

James PoV:
I was in my office working when i got a text. 'This is Zoe your social worker. I'm coming round later for a years check on ems you don't have to do anything just a check - Zoe'. Fuck sake! The last thing Emily needed was the social worker. I decided to tell her. "EMS?" i called. "Yea?" She said coming in my office. "The social works is coming round. Don't panic..please. It's only a check." I said. She did panic. "Calm..calm.." i said. "It's okay.." i took her hands. She calmed down. Luckily it didn't escalate. "I can't do that again..." she mumbled. "Hey..shh..it's okay. Don't panic. I'll be here okay? If you need a break just tell me" i smiled. She hugged me. Her head on my shoulder. "It's okay..shh" i said. I kept her close. After a few minutes the door rang. Fucking hell she only just text me! "I'll get it" i said letting go of ems. She followed me out and i opened the door. "HIYA!" Zoe said. She's so energetic. Ems flinched. "It's okay.." i mumbled to her opening my arm. She walked over and i rested it on ems shoulder. "Hi.." i said. "I'm just here to make sure ems is settled and is happy here.." Zoe said walking in basically pushing me out the way. "James..i can't.." ems said. "Hey... it's okay. Remember if you need a break just tell me yea?" She nodded at me. We sat down with Zoe. Immediately ems leg began shaking. "So..Emily? Are you happy here?" Zoe asked. "Yea..I'm happy" ems said. She was clearly nervous. "Breathe darling..it's okay.." i said. She opened her hand looking at me. I took it. She took a deep breath. Good girl.. i thought. "Yes i am happy here. I'm very glad to live with James" she said. "Okay..and does he look after you properly? Feed you? Treat you with respect?" She asked. "Yes..he does! He helps me with everything. He helps my anxiety and my ADHD. He's always happy to talk whenever i need and he makes sure i take time for myself." She said. She seemed quite calm. "Okay..can i just look around your apartment?" She asked me. "Yea go for it" i said. She stood up and began walking around. Ems hand was shaking. "Hey..hey what's wrong?" I asked. "I can't do this..not again.." she mumbled. "Hey..hey! You're doing great darling...you're okay." I said. "No! No I'm not!" She said standing up. "Hey darling..where are you going?" I asked as she put her shoes on. "Sweetheart..hey cmon.." i said. "Darling dont leave! Emily I'm serious!" I said getting annoyed slightly. She looked at me and walked out closing the door. Fuck sake! "ZOE? ILL BE BACK EMS WALKED OUT!" I said putting my shoes on. Zoe came out. "Why has she walked out? Where is she going?" Zoe asked me. "I don't know she's just stressed I'll be back!" I said walking out. Zoe fucking followed me. I began running as it was late. I was worried about her being alone in the dark. I began looking for her.
Ems PoV:
I'd walked out! It was dark and i was panicked. Fuck! Why'd i do that?? I was scared. Yes i had been to Brighton a few times and knew my way but it was different in the dark..very different! I sat down..i took deep breaths as i felt a panic attack rising. I picked up my phone and tried calling James. SHIT! it was dead.. "EM? EMILY?" i heard someone shouting my name. "Emily? Please darling! Where are you?!!" It was James. "James?" I called. He came running over. "Oh darling there you are hey shh" he said hugging me. "I'm sorry" i said crying. "Hey..shh it's fine. You were stressed and i totally understand I'm sorry for getting mad at you." He said. I hugged him tightly crying into his chest. "Hey shh..your okay" he said. "I'm really sorry! I didn't mean to scare you! I just can't deal with that fucking social worker checking on me! Asking me questions!" I said. "Hey i know! I know! She stresses you out yea?I know it gets too much for you" he said. "I'm pathetic! 16 and crying like a baby! Fucking pathetic" i said. "Hey no your not..hey don't say that about yourself! You're allowed to cry, you're allowed to be stressed and take time for yourself. Don't put yourself down okay?" He said. I nodded..still crying. "Cmon..I'll take you home sweetheart and we can talk about how you feel?" He offered. "Yea..please.." i said. "Okay..cmon" he stood up and held out his hand. I took it. Just then i saw her., Zoe.. "I'm not talking to you if she's going to be there.." i said. "Hey..she won't" James said. "Zoe..kindly please leave us alone. She's clearly upset and wants to talk with me alone.." he said. "I understand. For what I've seen your a suitable father for Emily. I'll be in touch" Zoe said. She turned around and walked off. I walked back with James. "Darling..you ready to talk?" James asked me. "I..yea" i mumbled. "Okay...we're chat in my office okay?" He said. I nodded following him to his office. "Right..what's bothering you? And be honest sweetheart I'm here for you okay?" He said. "I just..can't deal with it all. Everyone's always on at me about one thing or another! I can't deal with it! It's just they hate me or want to hurt me! Or i hurt myself.." i said. James looked at me. I continued. "If i hurt myself you get mad..if i don't..i get mad. If someone else wants to talk with me i just can't! I hate talking about my feelings! I hate it! It makes me feel worse when someone knows I'm struggling because i don't want them to constantly ask me if I'm okay! BECAUSE CLEARLY IM NOT!" I shouted. I stood up. I was angry and upset. "Hey..okay...okay.." James said softly. He stood up from his chair. I backed away. "Hey..it's okay.." he said holding up his hands. "I don't wanna live with it anymore" i said crying again. "I wanna fucking die! Why did you stop me? JAMES I DIDNT WANT TO LIVE AND I STILL DONT!" I shouted crying harder. "Hey shh shh no..darling don't think like that. Please.." he said. I could hear his voice breaking. I felt guilty but I'd told him how i felt just like he asked! "Okay..okay..shh.." James said. He stood infront of me. "Your okay ems..your okay Emily.." James hugged me. I collapsed in his arms in full tears. "Hey shh shh...your okay" James guided me to the floor resting me in his lap. "Shh your okay! Please it's okay..I'm glad you've told me but don't ever think like that.." he said. He hugged me tightly. I hugged him back my fingers gripping his shirt. "Shh..shh" he said again. "I'm so sorry! I'm so fucking sorry" i said. "Hey don't apologise I'm glad you told me how you feel. I'm so sorry i didn't realise how you felt..please don't think about hurting yourself or killing yourself..please darling. I need you" James said his voice broke. "I'm sorry..it's too much for me. I'll try to hold on but it's hard" i cried. "Hey shh i know it is! Trust me i do..just don't try anything again. I'll help you as much as i can. I know I'm not much but I'm something.." James said. "James your everything! I love you more than anything..i need you. But it's hard.." i said. "Shh..i know. Life's hard..yours especially but i promise I'll never hurt you and I'll always be here" he said. I cried into him..his shirt was getting wet as i cried more and more. "Your okay.." he said rubbing his hand over my head gently. "I love you..I'm so sorry!" I said. "Don't say sorry darling..just calm down..it's okay..you've told me how you feel and I'm glad about it..just calm down.." he said. I just cried while he rubbed my back...