|POLARITY| Gojo Satoru x Reader

21.

Hey, we time skip to the jjk 0 movie, if you havent seen it please go watch it, this is after Yuta fights Geto. Enjoy?

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Gojo's POV

I didn't mean to find him at all. My plan was to arrive after he was already gone, not for it to end like this. Suguru holds his shoulder, limping through the corridors as I stand here, a coward.

"Absolutely wonderful..." He mumbles to himself. "Truly the power to change the world." He slowly walks towards to me, and with each step, I can feel my heart hurt; my eyes watering. Don't come closer, Suguru. I can't act like I didn't see you if you come towards me... "If I had Rika, there would be no need to sneak around gathering curses." He is smiling, so lost in his delusions he doesn't see me standing at the end of the path. "Next time... I'll get her next time." His eyes  are unfocused before darting to mine; turning dark and full of emotion as he sees me. "Ah," he leans against the wall, smiling before sliding down. "You are late, Satoru."

I'm a coward. I couldn't kill him then; can I even kill him now?

"To think you'd be the one here at my end."He murmurs with a soft smile. How can he smile at a moment like this? My jaw clenches, unable to respond. "Is my family safe?" His voice sounds so pained that it makes me feel a pang of pain on my chest.

"Every last one of them managed to escape." I reply trying to at least gift him this peace of mind before... I take my only friend's life.

My mind goes quiet after that thought passes by. I'm going to take my only friend's life.

What did we do to deserve this ending? Why couldn't things stay the same? Why couldn't he choose me before his idiotic ideals?

I slowly come closer, his face covered in crimson red, his lip trembling.

"I trusted you." I say. That has always been the problem. "I trusted that a man as principled as you wouldn't kill off young sorcerers without a reason."

"Trust, huh?" He chuckles, and my mind is immediately plagued by the memories of the amount of times I've heard that sound, and the fact this will be the last time I'll get to see him chuckle. I make sure to memorize it, to keep it for myself. "I didn't think I still had any of that left." My eyes swell up with tears as a tear falls down from Suguru's cheek. 

In another life Suguru... it will have to be in another life.

"Do you have any last words?" My voice is shaky. I don't want to do this.

Why does it have to be me...

"No matter what anyone says, I really do hate those monkeys. I hate that they are weak... But I never held any hatred for those in Jujutsu High. Well, I do hate her  for changing you, we could have changed the world." He always said that to me, that she made me weak. 

It wasn't her that did.

"Suguru..."

"She is alive..." My eyes widen. "I lied to you years ago in that mission, you kept proving and I just wanted you to stop asking about it" His lip trembles. "So I told you she died... " He sighs as if reliefed of getting it out his chest. "She is alive, your little puzzle. That day, the wounds that you received, they somehow appeared on her. It was her blood." He sobs as I stand there.

 "Do I still have your trust?" He whispers, tears running down his face.

I swallow the lump in my throat. I slowly crouch to see his eyes one last time. "Suguru... my best friend, my one and only." I smile and after a couple of seconds he smiles back. I really can't hold anything against him.

"At least curse me a little at the end." He chuckles, wiping his face. "We both know I deserve it."

My heart skips a beat as we stare at each other with an understanding of what needs to be done.

It is time. I take a few steps back. I don't want to see him suffer; I don't want to see him at all, not like this. My lip trembles; I don't think I'll ever be able to live with what I'm about to do.

 I cast it.

"Im so sorry, Satoru" Suguru looks at me with a last smile before lowering his head.

"I'm sorry too, Suguru." My voice break as I take a deep breath. "Im sorry."

I release it. The silence that comes afterward. The sound of his body hitting the floor, it will haunt me forever. I close my eyes. I'm a coward for not looking at what I did as I turn around, my mind feeling nothing but despair.

It had to be done. I couldn't allow more deaths...

Excuses.

I inhale sharply as I feel myself lose part of my soul, tears cascading down as I hold myself 
"Im sorry...." I sob "Im so sorry..." I sniffle looking up at the sky.

I curse hearing my students voices at the distance, I lower my blindfold, drying my tears as I stand up.

Hold it Satoru... 

I walk towards them with too many thougts in my mind... Suguru... and also her, the reason she dissapeared. If she is alive... is she here, is she in Japan, the elders must have called on her. I am sure of it. 

Lets pretend I didn't do what I did, just for one more hour. After that, I am going to find her.

I clap seeing my students safe and sound "Congratulations!" I smile. 

I can feel a chime in the back of my head, like if its telling me I can't turn a blind eye to the present for long, each chime making my body tense up, I feel my reverse curse energy react to my situation, filling me with anesthesia for a pain that isnt physical. I don't deserve the numbing of my senses, I can feel my blood slowly start to boil.

I'll kill the person that is responsible...