My Mind.

03/27/13

I zone out. 

A lot.  

I don't notice when I do it. 

Talk to me when I zone out. 

Do it. 

You won't get a response out of me. 

Same thing when I'm focused. 

I have a hard time purposely zoning out or focusing. 

Those two just happen when they want to. 

Or when I'm absorbed in my art. 

It's something I can't control. 

I hate when I can't control things. 

I feels so out of control. 

Ha ha. 

As I write this, I'm realizing how antisocial I really am.

I secretly wish that one day someone I know will read this.  

Whatever this is... 

My explanation... 

My thoughts... 

My mind... 

Me... 

Yeah, you get to read me. 

It would be hilarious to see someone I know read this.  

My mind, my thoughts. 

It would make me extremely nervous and feel out of control. 

But it would be good.

Oh, my temper. 

Oh, the thoughts I get when I lose my temper. 

Violent. 

Not necessarily physically violent. 

My head just goes violent. 

Physical violence, kind of been an issue. 

I've learned to control it though. 

Oh, control. 

Something I hate, but love. 

Look at me with one of those looks. 

I'll be mentally punching your face. 

Even if I love you. 

Love doesn't stop me. 

The only thing it stops is ending my life. 

So for that, I'm thankful.

Another something about me... 

I can read people. 

No I'm not a fucking mind reader. 

I can just usually tell when something is wrong with them. 

Even more if I know them. 

I can tell when someone does something but says they're doing something else, only to cover up their embarrassment, or ignorance, or embarrassment of their ignorance. 

I think I can tell when someone does that because I use to do it a lot.  

Just like I can tell when someone says they agree with an opinion, but they don't. 

Because I use to do that. 

Then I realized how stupid that is. 

So if you do that,