offshore | h.s

50

A/N: i am so sorry for not updating for over a month, i just really needed a break from the book. however, i'm back and ready!! keep in mind this chapter is relatively short to just ease back into things. love you all so much!!

HARRY STYLES

I storm out of our room, frustration boiling over. Buying this house was supposed to be the solution to all our problems, the key to a smooth transition to LA. But now, it feels like everything's falling apart. I'm seething with anger as I make my way to the kitchen.

The sight of a beer bottle on the counter sets me off. Without thinking, I grab it and hurl it to the ground, watching it shatter into a mess of glass and foam. 

Suddenly, I pause. What the fuck did I just do?

My chest tightens, constricted by an invisible force squeezing the air from my lungs. Each breath feels like a struggle as if I'm drowning in my own despair. Tears prick at the corners of my eyes, threatening to spill over as I succumb to the overwhelming weight of sadness.

I feel like a failure, incapable of doing anything right. Every decision I've made seems to lead to disappointment and regret. The walls of the kitchen close in around me, suffocating me with their silent judgment. I can't escape the suffocating grip of despair.

My mind races with self-doubt and self-loathing, a relentless barrage of negative thoughts tearing me apart from the inside out. I'm consumed by a sense of worthlessness, convinced that I'm destined to ruin everything good in my life.

My heart pounds in my chest, a relentless drumbeat echoing the chaos in my mind. I struggle to catch my breath, gasping for air as I cling to the faint hope that this torment will soon pass. But in this moment, all I can feel is the crushing weight of my own despair, suffocating me with its relentless grip.

With each step I take, the weight of the situation bears down on me heavier, as if the world itself is pressing down on my shoulders. 

I stop for a second and faintly hear the echoes of Avery's cries growing louder with each passing moment. 

I take a deep breath, steeling myself against the onslaught of emotions, before running back upstairs to check on her.

But as I reach for the doorknob, a sudden wave of hesitation washes over me. The sound of Avery's cries begins to subside, replaced by the comforting murmur of Gen's voice. I freeze in place, my hand hovering inches from the door, a knot forming in the pit of my stomach.

I listen intently, straining to catch the soft cadence of their conversation. Gen's soothing voice fills the room, "It's okay, Bubba, we all have nightmares sometimes," and I hear Avery's sniffles.

For a fleeting moment, I consider entering the room. But as quickly as the thought arises, I push it aside, unable to face it in my current state of vulnerability.

Instead, I turn away, my heart heavy with the weight of my own failures. I retreat back down the stairs, each step a painful reminder of the divide between us. I feel like a stranger in my own home.

I decide to take a walk, needing to escape the suffocating atmosphere inside. Frustration prickles at my skin as I slip on my slides, their familiar comfort a small relief. 

I grab my AirPods, hoping that drowning out the noise with music will quiet the storm raging in my mind. With each step towards the beach, I feel the tension in my muscles ease slightly, the promise of open space and crashing waves beckoning me forward.

As I approach the shore, the salty breeze hits my face, momentarily distracting me from the chaos of my thoughts. I take a deep breath, letting the familiar scent of the ocean fill my lungs, grounding me in the present moment.