Goodbye Graceful (Ronnie Radke love story, 3rd book in The Drug In Me series )

10. Release

**** thanks for your patience and kind understanding of my mini-haitus :) here we goooooo. Repost of the sexy Ryker XD I just can't get over it Shes gorgeous gahh.****

It was 2 weeks after my 21st birthday.

And, today, today was the day. The day I was released. I was finally getting out. This time, when that door closed, I would be on the outside, not locked inside.

I would officially be released from the rehab center. Leah would pick me up and we would drive to L.A, where everyone else was waiting. Everyone that cared at least.

So not Ronnie....

Stop it, it's a happy day, don't ruin it for yourself. You have good friends and you're getting out of here, you're free, don't sour it with thoughts of Ronnie.

I vaguely remember Echo declaring that I would have a party when I got out, so maybe that's what would happen. Or not. Either way, I was free, it was okay.

Leah found us an apartment, or should I say, Leah and Ryan found us an apartment. They had been spending an awful lot of time together..... It was cute.

The center threw me a going-away party, and most of the patients wished me well, but it didn't seem right, me leaving and them not. And I knew some felt the same, because I woke up to a paper taped to my ceiling, saying 'You cheated'.

Some of them think I got someone else to pee for me and used them to make it seem like I was clean and sober when I wasn't. It was crazy, but some of these patients were really estranged, there was no use arguing with them.

I got food thrown at me at breakfast and lunch, so much so that during dinner nurses surrounded me so that no one could get at me.

It was a very welcoming, kind-hearted going-away day......

The nurses made me cake and such, but I just wanted it to be over so I could go.

Finally they ended it, and I tried to be nice to everyone when I said goodbye and rushed out.

I would miss the safety in these walls, and I would miss Mr. Willows, and I would definitely miss Lester, but I was glad to be leaving.

Lester, I would never see him again. He was a therapy dog, and even though it felt like it, he wasn't mine.

Not seeing Lester every day, that would be the hardest part.

It was finally time for me to leave. I sat in my 'room', looking around at the whitewashed walls, and the tiny window. I felt the white sheets, looked up at the camera in the corner.

I had spent every night in here for 3 months. I had turned 21 in here. And now, I was leaving.

They had given me back the clothes I had been in when I had first come here. It had been so long since I had been in my own clothes, although they smelled like the subdued musk of medicine and cleaning supplies of this place.

I took a deep breath and stood up, looking back one last time at the room that would soon be given to another patient. Then the door closed and I was on my way.

I went to the front and signed papers acknowledging that I was clean and sober and ya da ya da.

Then I was waved out and gently pushed through a scanner, my body patted down for one last check-up.

That was one thing I wouldn't miss, the daily 'check-up' pat downs and nude examinations.

It was over just in time, because I was rather irritable today and I didn't appreciate the nurses rough, brisk hands on me.

I was led to the single door leading to the outside, and as the wind blew softly in, billowing my hair and whispering to me, beckoning me forward, my breath caught and I stood frozen.

This was it.....

With my hands shaking, my legs trembling, knees clanking together, I took a shaky step forwards, one step closer.

I saw the sunny rays lapping at the floor, wondering why I was taking so long, asking me to please hurry up so it could cover me, it's warm tongue flicking over my skin in the fuzzy, glowing warmth that only the sun can give you.

I took a deep breath and stepped closer, seeing the light touch the tips of my shoes.

Gathering my courage up and pulling the black sweater closer around myself, I sighed deeply and walked outside.

As soon as I got out, I felt the sun licking my face and kissing my hands, warming me up immediately.

I closed my eyes and loosened the jacket, letting the sun soak into my shoulders too, and I stood still, holding my arms out and turning my head to face the sun.

And that is how someone came running at me without me noticing. They catapulted into my arms and clung to me, bringing their legs up to wrap around my waist.

I took a step back and instinctively moved my hands to hold them up.

I felt like there was an overgrown koala clinging to me. I opened my eyes and grinned, unsurprised to see Leah hanging on me.

"Hey there little darling" I said, smiling at her. "You're free, you're free, you're fucking free!" she yelled, throwing a fist into the air, and I laughed.

"Yeah, I am. Now tell me where to go, lets go home" I said, and my voice broke, my breath catching as I said home.

Home, home....... I had a home.... Could I finally have a home?

She pointed me towards the car and then dropped down, unlocking her pretty blue cruiser and hopping in.

I hopped in and soon we were off, cruising down the highway. Leah was recounting to me all that had happened, and I was listening and relaxing, slumped in the car. I had begged Leah to keep the roof down so I could feel the wind and the sun lapping at me.

A few hours passed and we pulled into an apartment building.

Leah led me upstairs and soon I was stepping into my very own apartment with Leah. I reached out and grabbed her hand, staring all around.

There was a kitchen connected to a living area, a bathroom, a bigger bedroom (master?) with it's own bathroom, and a small room that was to be an office.

It was small-ish, and it was plain, not fancy. But it was ours. Leah's and mine.

I had a home.