Game Over: Life's Over

Tacos

I'd put off my schoolwork for several weeks and was working on getting back into it again. I liked the break but not for the reason I needed one. Not having to work on assignments or read anything was nice. It gave me a chance to try to relax, even if my brain wouldn't let me.

But I didn't want to give up on it. It was almost June and I didn't want to fall too far behind. I was almost done with school when I turned eighteen. I didn't want to give up and have my thirteen years of school be for nothing.

I was determined to graduate and say I accomplished something. I wanted something good to happen to me for once. I deserved it.

But I had several reading assignments that were in my way. I couldn't get myself to focus on the boring literature I was stuck reading. I had to read four books and then do reports on them. I was never very good at doing reports and writing papers. I wasn't confident that I could get them done now but I was determined to try.

Theo walked in from the kitchen and stood on the other side of the table. He was holding a coffee mug in his hands. "How's it going?"

I sighed and put the book I was reading down on the table upside down to save my place. I was only on the first of the four books. I still had a long way to go. "Reading is so boring."

"Just think, you'll be completely done once you finish reading. That should motivate you."

"I wish. I just can't force myself to do this."

"Take it one book at a time. You go from four to three and so forth. You'll work your way down until you don't have anything left to do. It's less intimidating that way."

It wasn't a bad idea. It was just hard getting started. "I'll try it."

"You can do it. You're smart."

"I'm glad you have faith in me."

He smiled. "Of course. That's what I'm here for. If you need any help, I'll be around."

"Can you read these books for me?"

He laughed. "Very funny. Get back to work."

I watched him go back into the kitchen. I wished I had his confidence. I knew I just had a few books to read and some reports to write but it felt like such a daunting task. My brain was mush and there was no way I was finishing.

I sighed and picked up the book. I carried it with me and headed for the backyard. It wasn't very big and Theo and Eric didn't have a play set or anything for me to do on the grass. Flowerbeds lined the fence around the perimeter of the yard and brought some color to the dull yard. No wonder they pushed for me to go to the park so much.

I sat down on the cushioned swing that sat on the patio and laid back so I could be more comfortable. Maybe a different environment would help clear my mind so I could focus on getting through the books and finally getting my diploma.

---

"Jacob. Jacob, wake up. Jacob."

I blinked my eyes open and looked up at Eric. He was standing beside me, practically watching me sleep. His figure was blocking the setting sun from my sight which made it easier for me to see him. "What?"

He smiled like there was something funny happening. "Theo said you've been out here a few hours. You must have fallen asleep."

I pushed myself up and the book I had been reading fell from my lap and onto the ground. "Oops."

Eric picked up the book and looked at the cover. "I thought you would have liked this one. It was one of my favorites in high school."

"I think I made it close to halfway before I fell asleep." I rubbed my eyes with my fingertips.

"You've been sleeping a lot lately. You're not going through a growth spurt, are you?"

I looked at him with my eyes a bit widened. "I've shrunk like almost a foot. I doubt I'm gonna grow at all anymore. I'll be lucky to stay where I am."

Eric sat down beside me. "There's nothing wrong with being short. I don't know why kids make fun of someone for their height. It's not like anyone can really change it."

"Do you think I could get my legs stretched out?"

He laughed. "I don't think your mom would approve."

"It was worth a shot."

"You're getting close to graduating. Are you excited?"

"I'm ready to be done."

"What are you going to do after? Do you want to try college? There are lots of degrees you can get online."

I shook my head. What was the point of going to college if I wasn't going to do anything with the degree? "No college. I haven't figured out what comes after this. I haven't even thought of it."

"Theo said you like going to that playgroup at the Community Center. That's something to look forward to."

"I guess so. I'm still working on making friends there though."

"I thought you had friends."

"Yeah, but... we only see each other there or at the park. I don't have any that can come over and hang out. It's not the same, you know?"

"You can invite them over. We wouldn't mind."

"I'll think about it." Hopefully, Will and Soleil wouldn't be opposed to it.

"Theo and I are pretty flexible. We'll do whatever we need to in order for you to be comfortable here. We want you to be happy here."

"Thanks." Eric and Theo were a lot nicer than I gave them credit for. They did more for me than they probably needed to be. I definitely wasn't going to complain.

He patted my knee before he stood. He handed back my book. "Come on. Dinner's ready. Theo made tacos."