Game Over: Life's Over

All I Can Ask For

It was raining out and the living room was dark, even at eleven in the morning. I sat on my makeshift couch with my Switch in my hands, trying my best to improve my driving skills so that if I ever saw Soleil again, I could finally beat her at Mario Kart.

Theo walked in from the kitchen with a sippy cup in his hand. He held it out for me as he approached. "I heard from Carrie."

I took the cup and set it down beside me. I set the Switch down, too, and gave him my full attention. "You did? What did she say?"

Theo hesitated and I got a sinking feeling in my stomach. He sat down on the couch closest to me. "I don't know many details but Soleil's not doing so well."

I slowly pushed myself so I was sitting up straighter. "Like... like how?"

He sighed. "Carrie didn't go into too much detail but from what she told me, Soleil is dealing with some effects of the mutation."

Shit. "Can we go see her?"

"She needs some time to get through this first. It might be a while before you can go see her."

I frowned. "But..."

"You felt the same way, didn't you? You were nervous about seeing people and afraid they would judge you because you were different."

I nodded. I hated that Soleil felt that way. That was why I wanted to visit her. I wanted to let her know that there was nothing wrong with her and that I still wanted to be her friend, regardless of what she looked like.

"I don't know what changes she's dealing with but it must be enough to keep her from following her normal routine. I told Carrie that you were concerned and to keep us updated when she could."

I nodded. That was probably all we could do. I wanted to do more but there wasn't any more I could do in that moment. I just had to wait her out and help when she was ready.

"I wish I had more to tell you. It's hard not knowing what's going on when you're so concerned."

"Yeah."

Theo looked at me sympathetically. "Are you okay? I know this is a lot to take in."

I stared down at the floor. I wasn't okay. I hated that Soleil was going through something so difficult and I couldn't help her. I didn't even know if she wanted my help. It was hard asking for it so there was the possibility that she wanted it but was scared to ask me. I just hated the whole situation.

"Jake?"

I turned away from him so he wouldn't see the tears building in my eyes.

Theo slid off the couch and knelt beside me. He stayed quiet as he pulled on my arm, getting me to turn in his direction. He didn't have to do anything more to convince me to let him comfort me.

I leaned into his arms and chest and let myself cry. I let myself feel everything. Soleil was going through something horrible and I couldn't do anything to help her.

As I cried, I sunk into his arms. He was practically cradling me like I was an actual baby. I hated that my body was giving in to the stupid mutation. I didn't like that I acted like a baby. I hated the part of myself that I had no control over. I was at war with myself.

Theo adjusted so he was sitting on my couch. When he noticed I wasn't moving from his lap, he wrapped his arms around me so he could hold me better.

He picked up my sippy cup and put it up against my lips. I latched on and started drinking, letting him hold the cup for me.

I quickly realized that what he gave me wasn't a normal drink. It tasted like milk but like it was expired or something.

I made a face and pushed the sippy cup away.

"Jake, I need you to drink this."

I shook my head. "I don't like it."

"Dr. Simmons wants you to try the formula."

A sob escaped my throat and I started crying again. When I spoke, it came out more like a whine. "I don't want to."

Theo put the sippy cup back up to my mouth and fought against me as I tried to push it away. "Jake, please don't fight me on this."

Against my will, he held the sippy cup against my lips until I started drinking the formula. I didn't like it but he wasn't going to let me stop. Doctors' orders, I guess.

By the time I finished drinking the formula, I'd stopped crying. I was fine sitting with Theo and made no attempt to move away or get up.

Theo picked up my Switch and put it on the coffee table. "Do you want to go upstairs and take a nap?"

I shook my head. I was perfectly comfortable where I was.

"How about the couch? I think you could use the sleep."

I shook my head again. "I'm not tired."

"I find that hard to believe. It's your usual time for a nap and that's without me having to ask you to lay down."

"Can't I just stay here and watch TV? That'll be my nap."

"Lie down and watch TV. You could use the rest."

I rolled my eyes and pushed myself out of his embrace. I grabbed my Switch and sat down on the couch. "I'm not gonna nap but I'll at least sit here if it makes you happy."

Theo got to his feet and adjusted his shirt. Even in a T-shirt and shorts, he still had to make sure he looked good. "That's all I can ask for."

I turned the TV on and put something on that I didn't have to pay attention to. I went back to playing my Switch and Theo walked off to finish some chores.

It didn't take me long to get tired. I didn't want to admit that Theo was right but I was definitely in need of a nap. If my attitude weren't enough to convince me, my heavy eyelids surely would.

I curled up against one of the throw pillows and tried to force my eyes open so I could continue racing.

Theo walked up to the back of the couch and held something out for me to take from him. As I looked at it, I realized it was my binky with a clip attached to it.

"Stop trying to make me fall asleep."

He smiled as if he knew something I didn't. "I'm not doing anything. I just thought you'd want it."

I did want it but I hated that taking it from him would look like I was giving in. I didn't want to be forced to take a nap.

I stuck my binky in my mouth and rolled onto my side so I faced away from him.

He lifted the blanket from the back of the couch and draped it over my body, tucking it around me.

"Stop it," I said around the binky.

"I'm done. I'll be out back if you need anything." He left the room and a few seconds later, I heard the back door open and close.

I pulled the blanket up over my shoulders and blinked, my eyelids getting heavy. I groaned before I set my Switch on the floor. I settled back into the couch and fell asleep just moments later.