Game Over: Life's Over

Soleil Would Like That

Because my schedule has been a little messed up lately, I thought I'd give you a chapter today! There won't be a new chapter until next Tuesday (hopefully it will be on time). I'm sorry my upload schedule has gotten so messed up. I'm still working on finding time to write. My new job is taking all of my attention lately and I haven't even gotten into the thick of things yet. It's a lot to deal with so I appreciate you guys sticking with me through it!

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Soleil didn't reach out to me for a few more days. I went to playgroup and she wasn't there. I went to the park and she wasn't there either. It was starting to worry me that I'd said the wrong thing and upset her. She was already dealing with a lot and there I was, making it worse.

I was trying not to let it bother me. Soleil was the one dealing with everything so I wanted to be there for her. I needed to be there for her.

The silence the entire time had been driving me nuts. I couldn't help her if I didn't know what she was thinking or feeling. I tried not to feel like I had done something wrong but it was hard for me to not take it personally. Sometimes, people just needed some time away and I needed to respect that Soleil was feeling that way.

It just sucked.

I was eating dinner with Theo and Eric when Soleil texted me. I only had my phone with me because I was waiting on my daily message from Mom. Theo and Eric didn't like me to have my phone while we were eating but they made exceptions with Mom.

Soleil's response was short. Are you busy tomorrow?

"Jake, you know the rules. No phones during dinner," Theo said.

I gave him my best attempt at puppy dog eyes. "It's Soleil."

"Alright. Just this time."

"Maybe you should tell her about our rule before she gets you into trouble," Eric added.

I shook my head. "Soleil would like that."

Theo laughed.

I looked back at my phone and typed my response back to her. 'As far as I know, I'm free.'

It took her a minute of typing before her message popped up. Would you want to come over? We can play in my room.

I looked between Theo and Eric. "Can I go over to Soleil's house tomorrow?"

Eric raised an eyebrow. "She wants you to go over?"

I shrugged. "She asked."

"If you want to go, we can," Theo said.

I messaged back: 'Yeah, I can come over.'

I'll have Carrie talk to Theo about the time and stuff.

'Okay.'

I've missed you, Jake.

I smiled. 'I've missed you, too.'

See you tomorrow :)

Eric looked at Theo with raised eyebrows. Hearing from Soleil was just as surprising to them as it was to me.

I bit my tongue, hoping I wouldn't look like an idiot from smiling so much. I knew Eric and Theo were aware of my feelings towards Soleil but I also didn't want them to pick on me.

But I was really excited to see her.

—

As it turned out, I was a lot more scared than excited to see Soleil. I had a hard time sleeping that night and then felt anxious as time got closer and closer to when I would see her. I knew I had nothing to worry about but it had been so long since I had last seen her. I also couldn't shake the thought that she didn't want to see me during that time because of something I did or said, regardless of what I knew she was going through.

Anxiety was just a hard thing to shake. Even getting reassurance wasn't always enough to clear the thoughts from my mind. I had to tell myself - remind myself - that I did nothing wrong and had nothing to worry about before it could even leave my mind.

I packed up my Nintendo Switch and waited for Theo as he finished packing up my diaper bag. I sat at the bottom of the steps as I waited for him to come downstairs.

I chewed on my binky as I waited on Theo to finish getting ready. While losing my front teeth wasn't as bad a loss as I initially expected, I was surprised at one of the effects I had to deal with: teething. I hadn't seen a dentist since I lived at home with Mom and before my mutation started to wreak havoc on my life but I knew my teeth wouldn't come back. My adult teeth had fallen out so that meant I wasn't going to get any more in their place. But it felt like I was teething. I could feel the ache in my gums and the only thing that satisfied the feeling was to chew on something whether it was a binky or a sippy cup spout.

Theo had the diaper bag slung over his right shoulder as he started down the steps. "You ready?"

I nodded and pushed my binky into my mouth the rest of the way. I got to my feet and got out of his way.

As he came down the steps, he closed the baby gate behind him and pulled his keys from his pocket.

I was already a follower so I had no problem staying by his side as we left the house and he locked up. I wasn't allowed to go to the car on my own for fear that I would run out in the street or just take off in general. I didn't have any plan of doing that but we all had rules to follow.

I got into my car seat and buckled myself in. Theo set my diaper bag in the passenger seat and then shut the door. He shut my door and walked around to the driver's side.

"Are you excited to see Soleil?" Theo asked as he started the car.

I nodded.

"I'm sure she'll be happy to see you. I know she's missed you."

"I missed her, too," I mumbled around my binky. I couldn't wait to see Soleil to catch up. We'd gone too long without seeing each other. We had gone too long without talking to each other, too.

I was glad it was going to end with us seeing each other.