stray kids Little space

self doubt

Baby space chan

Caregiver lee know

"im sorry to announce, lee know, you will not be debuting with straykids." 

not a single noise.

everyone was quiet as if they had there mouth glued shut

lowering my head, i pinched my arm to not let out a tear.

i looked up a gave him a smile.

he came towards me and gave me a pat on the head before walking off.

still, not a sound.

"congratul-" chan suddenly threw soemthing at the wall.

startled, i flinched back scared of the angry mad.

his face was red, veins sticking out his neck and arms, and eyes looking a lot more red.

"no,no,no NO, your not going its no- no it wasn- wasnt supposed to go like th- that no.." chan was freaking and everyone was too scared to touch the man fearing of being the next thing thrown across the room.

"it-its my fauly i-i didnt do enough its my fauly i sh-should i pushed harder and d-did more.." everyone started to try and get him out of his transe but he wasnt liseting he just kept ranting on about how he didnt tey and ahrd enough, didnt do enough, and it was all him no one else.

"i-i just needed to co-"

gasp

not being able to breath he was breathing harder and harder bringing his hand up to his chest.

its like he could hear voices around him but he couldn't move, he couldnt speak, his eyes where blury, his breathing was fast, he kept coughing in between them not being able to figure out how to breath. every tiem he tried it was just a hard sob that mad his chest hurt even worse.

he felt was he was under and couldn't fight his way back up. 

'breath'

he kept telling him self to and remembering all the soft praises and words he has told.

but he couldnt do it.

his vision went from blurry to black,

he couldn't hear voices anymore, in fact, he couldn't hear anything

almost like eh was trapped in a bubble away from the world.

his breathing slowled down and slowly collected him self.

realizing his eyes where shut opened them

he could hear now and it was like they where layered or inocorrent.

he was in the arms of someone very comfortable.

he had a green sweatshirt on and was rubbing back up and down.